http://www.diary.com/g/162167
2008
June
http://www.diary.com/g/963e93
http://www.diary.com/g/3a6003
http://www.diary.com/g/926c4e
http://www.diary.com/g/1b72fe
http://www.diary.com/g/6eb25f
http://www.diary.com/g/382d0b
http://www.diary.com/g/f809da
http://www.diary.com/g/bb8580
http://www.diary.com/g/b338b8
http://www.diary.com/g/8780b8
http://www.diary.com/g/1f8537
http://www.diary.com/g/d9456a
http://www.diary.com/g/3d215e
http://www.diary.com/g/07a9de
http://www.diary.com/g/d0ca19
http://www.diary.com/g/14079e
http://www.diary.com/g/afe62b
http://www.diary.com/g/847d38
http://www.diary.com/g/0445d0
http://www.diary.com/g/c89a80
http://www.diary.com/g/8b0082
http://www.diary.com/g/501fec
http://www.diary.com/g/582742
http://www.diary.com/g/6a1af8
http://www.diary.com/g/fb5574
http://www.diary.com/g/6fd555
http://www.diary.com/g/c74fbe
http://diary.com/g/317423
http://diary.com/g/62c9d0
http://diary.com/g/109bb9
http://diary.com/g/d2557e
http://diary.com/g/194af2
http://diary.com/g/4142da
http://diary.com/g/724fdd
http://diary.com/g/39150e
http://diary.com/g/f7042f
http://diary.com/g/da04ea
http://diary.com/g/2d790a
http://diary.com/g/1b9400
http://diary.com/g/de732c
http://diary.com/g/162a1f
http://diary.com/g/656cd5
http://diary.com/g/91500f
http://diary.com/g/2e5389
http://diary.com/g/ea3460
http://diary.com/g/9848f9
http://diary.com/g/6527e1
July
http://diary.com/g/90aaca
http://diary.com/g/b46b30
http://diary.com/g/c0833e
http://diary.com/g/c30fd0
2009
February
It is the first. I will shave!
I have shaved, but not very thoroughly. My moustache is now catching up with my beard though, so that is good news.
@JSlayerUK you have an android phone? wow, is it very good? I want to replace my n95 in a while but the g1 didn't look too mind-blowing.
snow!
We have the ingredients. Club sandwich time.
club sandwich ruined by weirdo bread.
just destroyed my mouth with an insane madras
tesco value cookies are a bum deal
Writing corny narrative for the game.
I have really slow reactions. Apparently the mean is 180-200ms, I consistently get around 440ms.
making pleasing progress on the game
@JSlayerUK Not just you. I tend to think I'm pretty fantastic, and I find writing cover letters impossible too.
Scone success! Clotted cream and everything.
Walktall just sent me a sale email with just size 13 shoes in it. Clever thinking!
no sir, I don't think I am a fan of sweetmeal biscuits
I don't know when it became OK to put chorizo on a hamburger, but I certainly wasn't consulted
interactive timeline snow map! yes! http://is.gd/iwTS
worked out how to do the theorem prover, will code tomorrow.
well, technically it's tomorrow. couldn't sleep, and got it working first time!
flat out do not understand my grammar parser. Might have to rewrite it.
turns out my logic thing wasn't as good as I thought. I've rewritten it the proper way, and the grammar thing is still getting on my nerves.
@JSlayerUK practically every little village in northumberland has a shop with one in the window. They reappeared a few years ago, dunno why.
watch Ketch! and Hiro-Pon Get It On on iplayer. Very funny but so arty.
vanishingly little progress made today, still getting the new grammar thing to do everything it needs to
finished new grammar system!
today I had a serrano, monterey jack and mayo sub. It was ok!
is some kind of programming god
http://www.txbeef.org - tex-mex recipes galore!
@aperfect was that on mac or pc?
"the joy of sex education" arrived today, rated 18. Progress!
staring at the Koala Survivor, so happy
@JSlayerUK marcus brigstocke had a go with the late edition but he didn't have anywhere enough good writers to make it work.
loooves the snow
@brittneybean wow! my wongo-tall-guy chair cost about £400, but uni disability support paid for it. I'll look on ebay when it breaks, thanks
finished marking. 3 1/4 hours! Some students' handwriting is like a child's scrawl.
@kenfodder shouldn't you be using diary instead of twitter?
the exciting bossa nova samba rhythms are still my favourite albums
it is in fact The Bossa Nova: Exciting Jazz Samba Rhythms
got to write a new font system because hardware-filtered scaling looks awful
9pm and I still haven't made my dinner
@aperfect making a hilarious attempt at meatballs following the old fashioned cookbook
meatballs would've been nice if I'd had a real tomato sauce. At least they were cooked.
New font thing works! Still a programming deity.
@aperfect you and alisha's attic, sheesh
working on new fencing bit, dude is already comical
bad mood = dominos
cutting the vitruvian man into bits for a skining experiment
sorting out my eejit flatmates' energy bill affairs
@kenfodder heh, you mean there isn't someone at twitter judging every picture?
@aperfect that can not be good for you
so much traffic. What's the deal,geordies?
just realised I haven't looked at b3ta in weeks!
"Kangaroos are not terrifying. This is why so many tourists are mauled by them."
@brittneybean just say 'BFF' a lot. They love it.
I recant all opinions I have held of PG Wodehouse
trying to decide how to draw fencing dudes
I'm sure radio 4's late night schedule is designed to instil existential doubt
new series of one! radio 4! listen!
I now own three different sets of compasses. I might have a problem.
@aperfect wow, where?
this student has narrated every one of his thought processes on his homework. I do not need diagrams explaining how to read numbers!
or a reminder of the values of hexadecimal digits on EVERY QUESTION
just destroyed my nose with too much onion in coleslaw, and destroyed my spare ribs with too much heat
playing jumpman lives! loving it
@aperfect damnit!
I'm going to read some more Jeeves. Nothing else is presenting itself for my attention.
@GreyAlien no way, skidracer has just offered to help with music for the game!
on a seaside adventure. Blyth beach is lovely and calm, like the kind of thing you'd find on a model train set
lovely sand at blyth. Don't know why newbiggin felt they needed new sand. How different can it be just a couple of miles up?
wind's beginning to pick up
spent an educational 15 minutes driving through blyth town centre following signs for bedlington.
now at cambois beach. Not much here apart from a pair of wind turbines sticking out of the ocean like neptune giving us jazz hands
had to drive through blyth power station to get here by the way. Don't know if it still exists, but it felt like i was becoming its fuel
there is a big ol' pipe at cambois which spews out sewage, and a dogging site where gays, it would seem, are not welcome
first sensation that welcomed me to newbiggin-by-the-sea was the smell of dog poo. Let's see if i can see that statue
these kinds of things are meant to be engineering marvels, not sensible compromises given situational constraints
RNLI were washing out their shed. Nice and warm here, pity about the rest of it
took the wrong turn off the coast road but ended up at QE2 country park. Lovely! It's got swans and a big lake and things.
arrived at druridge bay country park. Not the same thing cp druridge bay itself! Leaving, lovely scenery but no way i'm paying and displayin
was enticed to hauxley by a nature reserve. Lovely place! Good georgian buildings. Seem to have found the coast again.
brought a moleskine to write in but i'm using twitter instead. Which is more pretentious?
just noticed shozu hasn't been geotagging anything since blyth! Arr
failed to exit Amble pointing in the correct direction, hungry, clouds arrived, so I've come home
had a flash of inspiration for fencing controls
I concede defeat to this bug. It has me absolutely baffled, and is a show-stopper
fixed the bug! stupid y axis, hiding from me
@arowxGames another blitzer from the north-east! (I'm warpy on the bb.com forums btw)
@aperfect the internet is a scary place
at the barber's. Thought i might hit the lunchtime rush but apparently there's no such thing in pity me
@JSlayerUK I once accosted tony benn in the street at the miners' gala. he is a funny person
game is back on track. Had a brainwave
a whole month until the f1 starts! can't wait
@GreyAlien well done! Is 64bit support for the bigfishgames app in the works so I can try it out?
@GreyAlien I clicked that, but then the installer says "failed to open file for writing" for every file
@GreyAlien maybe just store tiny black/white pixmaps of each character, and apply effects at install/run time
@GreyAlien actually, just remembered my dad wrote the first ever kanji gui. I'll ask him how he did it
March
@GreyAlien if you're around, get latest github version of game, exciting new gameplay!
man, the end of being human was such a let-down
this student writes like a 4-year-old! getting on my nerves
@JSlayerUK congrats! what's the job?
there's a glaswegian on the news who used to drink 14 bottles of wine a day. Top Glaswegian!
Decimal Mod http://tinyurl.com/bgktac only way to play quake 3!
exploring bold new directions for bacon in cafe royal. Confit bacon - words can not describe the taste. My pants can
What is the deal with shoe shops only stocking up to size 9?
@sciencefest I've just discovered I'm in London the weekend of the makerfaire. What other sciencefest events do you recommend?
Curry sauce in the fridge has acquired to kill with a single taste
http://twitpic.com/1tlew - Check out me new clogs
Set off to work on time for once! Let's see if i can remember to do all my to dos
My new shoes are absolutely killing me. I can't feel my ankles any more
I like a lot of chocolate on my biscuit, and I have joined the Club
@sciencefest thanks, I've booked tickets to see the ig nobel thing!
Why are there vastly more boy ducks than girl ducks?
@NewcastleCC I'm reading The World of Jeeves by PG Wodehouse. I had avoided it for far too long. #wbd09
problems in my life: cold apples out of the fridgew
@JPickford is that in reference to the thing about boy ducks? I can't begin to see the connection between those things.
about to leave for tutoring. parked my car in an improbably small space last night, hope someone moved
reading candide again, had forgotten how completely bonkers it is. Need to increase the madness in the game
@naomzzb twitter's for, like, not msn but not email either. It grows on you.
"someone took a note in the face" - awesome dream which had a bubble bath explosion in it
"Brawn GP"? Really?
Pretty Lights is good music
WH Smith : now world of compasses, with protractor land
fat jazz man is singing! What a beautiful sight.
the new city library has those horrific metal slats across it like the life car park! Nice inside though
i guite enjoyed the yoko ono thing at the baltic
back at home, having a wonderful day
the new bbc weather thing keeps forgetting where I live
@aperfect here's a controversial thought for you - I think sunday morning might be my favourite track on tragic kingdom
@GreyAlien care to share?
@kenfodder yes! I love that advert too!
had a brainwave - use syllogisms in philosophy game
reading about tableau methods for proving first order logic theorems.
I've made an executive decision to get the htc magic, just need to wait a month for it to come out!
@sciencefest I loved eepybird yesterday! my bro took video: http://is.gd/moq3
I am at the limit of human boredom
reading a stats course. This isn't what I signed up for!
@brittneybean so they're saying the business world needs fewer people who understand finance? What?
PhD application submitted!
@aperfect are you thinking of starting a magazine?
stayed up far far too late last night, and downstairs were having a crazy loud party.
http://media.shozu.com/cache/portal/media/16b8a8/285213064 - 07032009179
@ShoZu just tried out twitter uploads, couldn't the url be shorter, something like tw.shozu.com/shortkey ? The truncated long url looks odd.
oh no! just remembered I was going to pick up my marking today, so I don't have to do it at the weekend! disaster plan!
random old lady just sat down opposite me in starbucks. She hasn't said a word.
pooped. Need burgers
in gbk!!!
just had a fantastic chicken melt and ice chocolate in caffe milan in kensington
@JSlayerUK it's been done, sorry
what? greek student has got his greek letters wrong. THE WORLD IS UPSIDE DOWN AND WE WILL ALL FALL OFF!
@theyellowstereo I'm still getting 503 errors intermittently
@Martinmagnusson your concept game looks a lot like what I've been doing lately! I'd be interested to find out details of what it's doing
@aperfect did you like it?
@Martinmagnusson http://www.somethingorotherwhatever.com but the relevant stuff isn't up there yet. check out Trader though
just spent an hour and a half helping two guys with dendrograms. You may ask what they are. I did.
energy madness continues!
no idea what to do with my tutee today. Just printed out yet another past paper
getting my code repository back in order, should all be in one place now
@aperfect A Camp sucks and you suck
@kenfodder you could use street view in conjunction with geocoding diary entries - eg I went here to eat, visited dude at this place etc.
@aperfect that's why I use twhirl
why is it always the goths who are out enjoying the sunshine in the middle of the day?
my feet are quite perfectly perched out the window and to move them would reduce my enjoyment of the day considerably
making dendrograms of 2d points. Can't think what to do with them yet
aahh what is going on today? just reopened the code I was working on, and the file is blank!
@komiga luckily, I'd put it on the code archives when I finished it. On reflection, it's completely useless to me, so no problem!
100% free of ideas
I have died laughing listening to the letter 25 minutes into this week's bugle
so many of the daily rituals at the start and end of radio 4 seem like they were conceived expressly for the purpose of disseminating codes
I revise: the morning is for nuclear submarine launch codes, the night schedule is designed to make you doubt the worth of existence
@nilium I always thought nicholas cage was on a quest to become a dadaist self-parody
back to twitterfox, twhirl keeps forgetting what buttons do
techno-madness continues. I think my phone problems were down to the pagefile counting as free space, so it actually didn't have any spare
ahhh pepsi have changed the shape of their ringpulls my world is collapsing please help
the squirrel just dug something massive out of the ground and ate it on the fence. He seems much less rascallous now.
I am an intellectual wasteland. What to do?
hello what is this? Two of the Cowards in a programme called "Brave Young Men", on iplayer now.
listening to Na Na Ni by Fredrik, very cool
@blitzbasic Function a(n)
Return n=1 Or n*a(n-1)
End Function
Print a(5)
@blitzbasic better! Graphics 99,99
Local x#,y#
While 1
a=MouseX()*4
x=Abs(x+Cos(a)) Mod 99
y=Abs(y+Sin(a)) Mod 99
DrawRect x,y,1,1
Flip
Wend
@GreyAlien hah, I spend 10 minutes solving that guy's problem and writing out a nice explanation, and you beat me with "google it"!!
the first google suggestion for "how to use" is "how to use a condom"? get it the right way round??
finally working on picaresque again
@JSlayerUK sounds like me yesterday
the BPA is good music
@JSlayerUK I rampaged and destroyed sundries in my room
first picaresque commit in about three weeks!
@kenfodder that is like the stereotypical geek thing
@GreyAlien yeah, rub it in
@GreyAlien just had a look at my old bb.com posts, didn't realise you'd been stakling me for so long!
SOCKCESS! found a matching pair, so happy
http://tinyurl.com/ch9hqt - Love my new vans -
@aperfect do you want national trust membership again this year? the renewal letter's just arrived
yeesssss! I have conquered my radio watch! now both bits tell exactly the right time! today is a good day
maths is like the best JML product ever - every topic ends with 'but wait, there's more!'
no news make cp go crazy
@GreyAlien that had better not be a dig at me!
oh my god this dude has written more words criticising my article than I wrote in the original! http://tinyurl.com/d9dtge
@aperfect not up here, it's quite gloomy
pulled a muscle in my back while eating a bacon sandwich.
tesco chocolate sandwiches are my new favourite biscuit
what is the deal with sourceforge deciding it doesn't exist?
@nilium I was just looking at it, and then it didn't exactly stop responding but it won't load either. dns resolves, but no progress is made
@rossturk it stopped responding for a while. I was looking at it, then it stopped responding, but dns resolved fine and other sites worked
yahoo maps is so awful. flickr geotagging could be so much more useful
that shreddies hunger monster has started drumming on my tummy. Should've locked hunger up til lunch!
@aperfect I really can't see OnLive working
@aperfect looking space, ha! you've cropped even more of it off
@fatfieldfoodie hello!
April
@brittneybean take pictures! this will be a defining moment of our times!
shaved on the 1st!
finished the chocolate sandwiches, oh no!
wrote shunting-yard algorithm in blitz; it worked first time. Glad!
I flat out do not understand what it is hamilton and mclaren did.
why does washington smell of fish?
at dad's, he hasn't even been in the shower yet.
headphones don't fit my sprocket! Can't listen to the bugle, bummer
@aperfect you've changed, man
@kenfodder I'm having trouble at the moment trying to pay my final bill for scottish power. Shoddy business!
@aperfect massive hp touchsmart for £500 in fenwicks! Not good for nana but good deal, no?
@aperfect was 979 but it was returned and had a tiny bit of trim missing, otherwise mint condition
got my media player auto playlist working again, and I am listening to good music once more! happy day
wmp has started playing the next song down in the playlist, while claiming to be playing a different track
@aperfect was 979 but it was returned and had a tiny bit of trim missing, otherwise mint condition
gosh it's hot!
at the blacksmith's in belsay having poached egg and ham
mmmmmmmm
new red dwarf is not bad!
made Blitz on Rails
ping pong season is open!
incredibly, starbucks is still open
oh no, it's closed
is there an opposite of esprit d'escalier? I remembered something I said yesterday and thought it was exactly the right thing to say
got my PhD offer!
@arowxgames look at the list of people following @blitzbasic
@Martinmagnusson thanks! it's at newecastle university, same as my undergrad, on decision problems in group theory
@arowxgames what is it?
@arowxgames looked to me like the small one was on top of the big one. the light would be refracted on the inside one, which is hard to do..
this week's newswipe is good
oh dear, the bbc have used the same stock snake image twice in two different stories
oh, long-winded student! I haven't missed you at all!
long-winded student no.2 has managed to constrain himself to 3 times the average!
@arowxgames I take it that's not a 24hour clock?
I dislike students who use cheap paper
uncomfortably farty after a piri piri pizza
ethics: is it right to give arbitrary marks for copied answers in the hope that the one who gets fewer marks complains?
"The Dowager Duchess of Devonshire" - fantastic! She worked hard to get all that alliteration
my car's been broken into!
and then I locked myself out of the flat
wasted 8 quid on stronghold. too german-autistic for me
in fact, that's not my problem with it. It just has a rubbish interface and doesn't draw me in at al
going to have a go at 3d
@aperfect for example http://dontclickthis.whatingods.name/ ?
I try not to be one of those people, but i'm sitting on my back step playing french radio and writing in a moleskine
hewwo! iplayer hd! http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/8008886.stm
wow it's good! I might stop watching normal telly
just had a girl at the door asking for Bruce and Conrad. Who's called Conrad these days, and why can't he give proper directions?
just learned that the doctor at the end of the street is called Konrad Conrad. WHERE ARE THEY COMING FROM?
@JSlayerUK I was just last night trying to decide who I should vote for next time. I think labour are out unless they calm down about terror
@GreyAlien I'm working on the game again!
there is/was a mathematician called Houshmand! That settles it, my next pet/child has its name
there is no finer roll than the sub
got a headache from writing too much rad code
http://tinyurl.com/db2qmj - Discovered a whole new bit of jesmond dene!
got up and ready nice and early for work then remembered it doesn't start until next week!
Lucy Schwartz is perfect
tomato soup time!
I made a mistake - it was tuna sub time
one day I will remember the bit of code I keep commenting out first time
empty google reader for the first time in months. I am at the limit of nothing-to-do-tude
I am so massively sweaty
I can not understand how anyone could like puff pastry
just spent 30 minutes refuting a student's nonsense
just pulled a ferrari - wrong clothes for the weather
massively bored. Nobody comes to maths aid on sports wednesday!
so nobody came in for the whole three hours, then ten minutes before leaving time a torrent of people with really hard problems appeared!
xkcd has got a bit better lately
ruddy southern builders, coming up here and taking jobs from honest hardworking geordies
May
I will stop complaining about my graphomanic student when he stops giving his working in triplicate
why has every single student chosen the same "random" number for their encryption?
I just sneezed! Seems one of the many possible disease vectors I've encountered lately has given me swine flu
what a rip. the htc magic is £50 more in the vodafone shop than the vodafone website
parmageddon! thanks to ben goldacre for correctly naming the current disaster
o2 need to hurry up sending my PAC code
got my pac code! had to ring up for it again though
overshot by 45 minutes again at maths-aid
@fatfieldfoodie two students came in wanting their whole course explaining so I couldn't leave until 2.45
Magiiiiiiic!
@kenfodder that is fantastic!
I will have to accept that this phone is going to get a lot of food on it
Wikitude is mind-blowing
Best game so far on android is buka
@ToonLibraries how do the music download stations work? are they for music in the library or are they just ways of accessing web music shops
@aperfect they've always done us maps
@kenfodder but it's been leveraged to be much more useful!
@aperfect you also won't get to servant live game because there's no way I'm going with you
@fatfieldfoodie my winner phone can play iplayer anywhere, unlike yours!
any suggestions for a text message noise? the goat is getting old
K-9 news was making my phone really slow, and I've now found the real email app so all is good
@JSlayerUK there are plenty of non-superhero comic book characters
At the race for life, hyperdosing might cure my colourblindness
The crowd goes wild as cp gets the Frisbee down from the tree by throwing the stick with a rope attached over it and pulling on the rope
A totally rank smell has appeared in my room, no idea where from
Chris waddle has a mondo crazy accent
saw a kid in wh smiths wearing a "white pride is not racism" t shirt. nice.
daaaamn! I forgot flight of the conchords was on tonight
making a sort of object database thing with lazy evaluation
long-winded student is the bane of my existence
I was just thinking about eyepatches and then i saw a girl with an eyepatch
helped a zimbabwean lady pick a mouse
having a technology nightmare
oh my god I love the smell of PVA
@JSlayerUK good luck!
couldn't even park on my own street!
@JSlayerUK no chicks?
who likes lo-fi music? what do these people look like? I don't understand.
another uninspiring emusicsmas. can anyone recommend some good new summery music?
writing nonsense on big paper
it's socks o'clock, time to go outside while it's sunny
oh wow, they're still updating rinkworks.com!
bought the settlers for my phone. it's not the game I know and love!
that pizza has had its awful revenge
the singleton design pattern as applied to socks: a case study. c perfect, 2009
one day I will think of a way of taking a book to the park without also having to take my big backpack
gosh heaton park's a lovely place
this dude next to me is not afraid to get his hands dirty in order to get the most out of his rolo choc pot
@aperfect but then I'll be a poser because it's an obscure classic
@aperfect oh no! tragedy!
FINALLY cracked my elbow! sweet relief!
said 'good morning!' to some poachers in the park. very agreeable chaps
minor achievements in a dog's life: picking up all of your toys at once
@aperfect spymaster is a pretty straightforward click-em-up. I've got am idea for a much better twitter game
@aperfect crouton
@aperfect tinny
@aperfect attain
June
shut up, gordon brown!
it's hard to plan meals when it's so hot
yellow doesn't go with green, does it?
@kenfodder it's been the same here for a while, thanks to the RIP act
@brittneybean they're great! the video for 'multiplayer' is ace
@aperfect cool new show at the design museum, according to front row
continuing my quest to clone ruby on rails in blitzmax, I've made an http server and the clever routing system
so massively chuffed with myself for making this http server work
the usb in my laptop has died, maybe it'll come back
saw a woman jogger with massive teeth as she ran past, she spoke American
just had an epic question answering session with a lady from the office of national statistics
@GreyAlien so that'll be two books then?
just found opening-times.co.uk. it's like isabevigodadead.com for sainsburys
textile has horrible syntax and I should've stuck with reST
on the flowchart of which animals avoid which other animals, apparently there is no route between me and bunny rabbits.
finally joy my B-tree algorithm working, after deciding to ignore the weird academic explanations and look at pretty graphs
@aperfect man, that sounds like exactly what I'm making
@aperfect David eddings has died!
I think one of yesterday's socks is stuck in my trousers but I'm in waitrose. and I can't check
man, no sock. what is this odd sensation in my pants?
phew,my xbox is still in warranty
the ups collection address form has a 'shire' field, below 'street' but above 'county'
dreamt that a geordie accentuate was the most efficient way of speaking
on my way to hexham for some cowboy kettle chili mix
going to have a look at hadrian's wall now
at chesters cavalry fort. rain can not touch god's own Northumberland, the weather is glorious
English Heritage is a total rip.
TCP and burnt tomatoes are on opposite ends of my smells preference spectrum
everyone is uncomfortably full after chili con queso
oh no spicy burps!
dare to dream: room revolution '09 in progress
@GreyAlien happy birthday! Hope you had a good one
Every time I walk into my room it cheers me up, now I've rearranged it
I'm not a fan of this belly any more, going to get rid of it
Rival teams of ticket inspectors arguing on the platform about who gets the next train
I walked straight past whitley bay because I've only been there when it's dark, and when I got back I managed to walk to monkseaton station
I need something to do
I find it so much easier to sketch with massive permanent markers than with normal sized pens
Just bought a bunch of pens, but not enough to justify a carrier bag. Now walking through heaton looking like I've got double thigh cancer
Man, I got a bum deal on these pens. Not going to that shop again
Going to attempt mulligatawny soup for the first time.
I love the gordon brown impression in 'the secret world' on radio 4
I've been stuck at home all morning trying to establish what's wrong with the phone wiring
MS sent me a brand new xbox with a new warranty and a month's free xbox live. Nice!
http://s3fm.co.uk/permanentbedtime mmmmm
Paid a fiver to go on the worlds tallest spinny thing at the hoppings. Well worth it!
Going to tynemouth farmers market, probably won't make it back for qualifying
Just noticed that all the signs at wallsend metro are in Latin
Bought some top food and might just make it back for the end of quali
Loving some Munk while I install the new windows
forgot it was emusicsmas. This day gets better!
This 'real Cumberland bacon' is the saltiest thing I've ever eaten
What does one eat at kfc? I think we're going to get some
Finishing off the world's saltiest bacon by making a BLT pizza
@androidandme Google chrome has blacklisted your site for apparently hosting malware. Might be to do with your new host?
I miss sitting outside in my pyjamas on a sunny day
Wow, the chaser's war on everything is on bbc four at ten tonight. Ace!
Why does the whole of kingston park smell of rich, melting chocolate? I am losing my mind to desire
@beefok strewth, that's a grim thing to post about
Playing battlefield heroes, have yet to see the Nazis lose
at dad's house, comparing phones. Mine is clearly loads better, why won't he admit it?
Bought a maths book that was 198 years old for a fiver at tynemouth book fayre. Fascinating!
Just dominated battlefield heroes. Feeling pretty special
Accidentally made a massive omelette instead of a normal one, to go with my chips and onion rings. It's full of bacon as well
@alimcg86 I know how it feels! that's what I have to pay whenever I want shoes.
July
three pigeons and a blackbird having fun in a puddle; cp not welcome
Where's the thunder storm the bbc insisted would be arriving during my constitutional? I could still be out there in the glorious sunshine!
Not a fan of the beetle having a kip on top of my (sealed) bag of chicken
Can't believe how unbalanced the snipers are in bfh
Phone was in sun; put phone in pocket; leg is burnt
@canwegoclub I prefer to think of it as a tax on optimists
@canwegoclub I've never bought a lottery ticket in my life, so I'll be more shocked than you if I win
Had a lovely day at the beach with Leo and Gabi
Leo just spotted an engraving error in the 1986 entry on the Wimbledon champions board. Top spotting!
@eqdynamics I don't think he's on twitter
God I love being out in the rain
At the hospital, dad is negotiating the terms of his release with the consultant
Just finished Michael Frayn's Collected Columns, which I enjoyed a lot
@aperfect what have you bought?
@JSlayerUK What happened? My mum wants to know
Saw a blackbird with some white feathers. How did that happen?
@nilium it wasn't an albino, it just had a few patches of white
The steak caesar salad at cafe royal owns me
I'm very confident that the channel 4 comedy sponsor guy bust now be the most hated man in Britain
Adam is fluffy traveller of the month July 2009
in America! We had dinner then lunch on the plane, and now it's 8pm local time. Do we need dinner again?
Jackson Hole is a really cool place
On the way to yellowstone!
In Cody, Wyoming. Scared by the patriotism and the guns and the Fox News. Hope the food is good
Oh no, Adam has started snoring! If I wanted to listen to that, I would've gone on holiday with dad
Spare ribs at Ted's Montana Grill was the best meal in America
Aaargh, the f1 sounds like an amazing race and I can't watch it in yankytowne!
Enjoyed the baseball quite a bit. My Rockies won, or rather, Adam's Giants lost
back in England, with stories for all and gifts for some!
SEVENTY TWO EMAILS? Never leaving the house again
real dairy milk is better than almost everything I ate in america
I have parked in BMWland. And I'm half an hour early for the flight. I blame Leo
August
@AndyOvine har har funny
@GreyAlien you sound like one of the fat cats from a looney tunes cartoon, endlessly monologuing the flow of money
Sat down for fish and chips in saltburn ready to enjoy an honest English meal and I was given an American can of coke! There is no escape!!!
"what a fun, sexy time for you"
A robin just flew into my room, close enough for me to grab it if I'd wanted. Was it on a dare?
Aahc 4od is stuck in an endless advert loop. The 3 comedy guy is the worst person in the world
Arrived at the Gite, and the TV only gets British channels. WHAT.
@aperfect what does that mean?
just did a little bike ride on the gite dude's road bike. Less comfortable than riding a horse
if pigs could fly, would the wings be the tastiest part?
The number of French magazines with bare breasts on their covers is astonishing. Quite a few are hardly relevant to the subject matter at al
I love the new mstrkrft album
new cabinet magazine! Just renewed as well, and I can't believe how cheap it is for what you get.
@aperfect nana says there's a jazz festival in canary wharf this weekend
Walk on the Wild Side is very funny
@mmm_newcastle would you be able to stock Jardine's Cowboy Kettle Chili? I've only ever found it in hexham waitrose and can't afford the gas
my Eternal Knee Rash has just started itching. I feel like a Pompeiian at the foot of a Vesuvius which has just started rumbling.
@badmachinery I hope the new comic includes more irishisms, that was funny
really wish 4od would give me the benefit of the doubt when skipping past ads; I'm stuck in a loop of the I Hate The Three Guy Show
@aperfect no!
yyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeessss! Winning a gold medal on Trials HD Hill Climb has pleased me more than my A Level and GCSEs combined. PRIORITIES!!
@arowxGames oh go on then, can I haveva password? Got to help local industry and all that...
@arowxGames ooh didn't see it, it was in my junk folder. Forget the email you just got
@arowxGames I can't download the exe, it gives a 404
@aperfect mum just told me not to bother celebrating wins because newcastle aren't in a real league
I have a flat! A ruddy expensive flat, though
Sitting in maths aid, no customers, bored silly
@mmm_newcastle my little brother says king naga chilli should never be eaten by anyone ever. He warned me at one point he was about to pop!
Hopesolutely
September
Why is there an Australian lady doing the public announcements on the metro?
@chiefchimpanzee I hope your Edinburgh show went better than that joke
@chiefchimpanzee it was actually quite clever, I was trying to think of something like the agency thought it was for the other newcastle...
@aperfect innteellliiimoooooouuusseee
arrgh, spelunky is so hard!
This week's walk on the wild side was brilliant!
Finally watched The Lives of Others, great film to watch on your own
Saw an old lady with an eyepatch. She was parrrtially sighted.
Ahhh radio 4 please stop picking books at bedtime which are all about people dying
I can see the bt man fiddling with the exchange. Maybe my internet is getting activated now and not this morning like they claimed!
New word - phtissitation: the realisation that the fruit you have been allowing to ripen for several days is completely tasteless
this woman on the metro looked alright ten minutes ago, but she's *still* putting makeup on. Know when to stop, orange lady!
aagh, why won't my heating turn on?
Nyooooooo: the sound I made when the anonymous youtube link I clicked on turned out to be titled "Kick-boxing leg break"
I am a mathematical god! Proved recursion with parameter substitution is primitive recursive all on my own, bet you couldn't do that.
going for a walk along the Tyne. South Shields actually looks quite appealing from a distance. Must be a crazy sea mirage
This sketchy pub is playing some really cool 60s lounge jazz. I think if I went in they'd ask what space age material my shoes are made from
I like grabbing my big toe with all the little toes on my other foot. I feel like a monkey
trying to buy some new disposable fountain pens and discovering office supply companies' ridiculous delivery fees
Adventureland was like a good Garden State
@kenfodder except the link doesn't have a name separate from its destination, and the sets of URLs and files do not overlap
my foppish urban haircut couldn't deal with the grim realities of Tynemouth; it had to go
"this album is turbo sweet"
At one point there were five people trying to work out how to issue me a smartcard and they still managed to spell my name wrong.
Pate on toast has only made me hungrier. Stupid smooshed up animals.
the milling on copella bottletops is painfully sharp
Just walked round to the co-op to buy some meat for dinner and it's been ram-raided or something.
God North Shields is rough. I saw someone get pulled over by the police, a hearse, and was stared down by an old lady crossing the road.
There is a lady selling posh popcorn at stanhope farmers' market. That is past my limit for ridiculous posh food
inadvertently used my fountain pen as a nose flute
yuk, my flat is insect central at the moment
Not only are this year's freshers taller than me, they're better looking too. I blame the labour government.
at the "I think I can see food!" stage, or day 2, of opening this packet of biscuits
just noticed that I get synaesthesia with moments from my life when I think maths
October
Meena's curry sauces are perfect. There is no better curry sauce.
if the turkmenbashi was still alive, he would put an i in team.
peeled a national front sticker off the metro. Sat and waited til nobody was watching though, not sure why.
why would google maps be smoother in firefox than chrome? Any ideas?
@aperfect disaster! Did they steal any of your crisp wrappers?
dead pigeon outside the nanotechnology lab. Maybe it had a... LITTLE accident?
I think every ingredient in this bacon cheeseburger I'm making has gone off. We'll find out tomorrow!
email from nana "RE: RICH GRANDSON". Rumours of my wealth have been greatly exaggerated.
Not sure how that many snails managed to get on the *inside* of the wheelie bin
@aperfect don't get the pre, get one of the shiny new android phones with a real camera and such
the ending of Charlotte's Web happened onto my car
Grey-haired lady with a nosering: it's repulsive and clearly interfering with your breathing. What's the deal?
Bored bored bored bored. Does anyone need any maths explaining whatsoever? I've been here since 10am!
the secret to lifelong happiness: hide bonus chocolate in your cupboards
Does anyone want to be my walking buddy? Nothing strenuous, just the public footpaths of tyneside
@dumbfirefly I have your background image on a t-shirt!
Tried to make a tuna sandwich; accidentally made tomato soup
How did I not notice the new series of The Thick Of It?
Died on the 26th of October 2009 watching House of Cosbys
@aperfect there's a spotify app as well, which I think your trendy laaaandan payscale can afford
WHERE ARE THESE FLIES COMING FROM?
@nilium not sure about that, they're big fellas
@peterrowlett I have lists too. Your maths one is very useful!
@JSlayerUK Yes, really yes. Unless he works for My Daughter is Wrong Enterprises PLC or something.
Pushchairs five abreast appeared round the corner. What was I meant to do? Your honour, the defence rests
@JSlayerUK all the museums in London closed at 5pm and I thought of you
November
Why are there so many French people in tynemouth today?
new BOAT album!
What are tynemouth's men wearing this season? Trousers tucked into socks. Chic!
Mum: "if there could be a bonfire, I'd put Roger McGough on it"
@peterrowlett what are you doing in newcastle? That's where I am!
oh my lord that Pie Minister steak and stout pie was exactly what I needed
ahh, tynemouth is a swing seat, might have to vote labour! I want my lib dem protest vote!
@peterrowlett hate to be one of those people, but did you get my email? My boss (Bill Foster) would like to see you as well, if you've time.
going to the lit phil on a reccy
Went to the lit and Phil on a reccy. Maybe I'll join eventually, but not now
Fort Christian has fallen to the Yawns..
Enlightening chat with @peterrowlett about CBAs and outreach, but shouldn't've made him walk the length of the town with all his luggage
@peterrowlett all the routes are scenic up here
aaaah I am doing too many jobs my brain is melting meltinggggggggg
haskell is nice for doing maths programming
@aperfect you are a wrong
@fatfieldfoodie I said the same thing about the cutlery! Didn't like my ceasar salad there either
@GreyAlien once you get the idea it's not that bad. I'm a way away from making a game yet though
3d channel 4 doesn't look very 3d
wow, free access to the cabinet magazine archive online for subscribers! That will occupy me for a long time
trying to work out how to represent pregroups in haskell
argh emusicsmas came too soon, I hadn't used all of last month's credits!
Group structure of a Rubik's cube in a black box with a cat peeling its stickers off, C Perfect, B Tormey 2009
@peterrowlett they're in the building next to mine. Will investigate, thanks. Not so sure it's more mathsy than engineeringy though
tonight I have added all the papers I've ever read to @mendeley_com
why do spiders like crawling up plugholes?
@peterrowlett Green's Theorem! That is an excellent mug! So are they more mathsy now, or was that the extent of it?
really not comfortable with paypal asking for a new security question and password during a transaction
the ticket machine at the station "couldn't connect to the TOD server". What to do?
Glasgow Subway: I banged my head on you; you are too small.
Oh no, the grandparents have started Christmas shopping! Won't get a nice seat on the metro until January now.
mary berry's caesar dressing tastes very sweet and not like caesar dressing, but I like it a lot.
I offer a prize of a tasty cake to anyone who can show a correlation between any economic phenomenon and the appearance of the panpipe dudes
@kenfodder even powershell?
@badmachinery envirocat tote bag arrived today. Probably a rash purchase, but it is very nice and I will heed its message.
left alone in a house full of chocolate treats which are all about to go off. There are only a few ways events can proceed; one is very fun.
really not happy with raindrops falling on me while I'm driving through the tyne tunnel
done a Ferrari again. Should've brought my umbrella and my coat, brought neither and now fearing getting off the metro
@peterrowlett see the maths hall in the science museum, but you already know that. The names of some of the Napier's bones clones are ace!
December
Keep forgetting I'm working with groups instead of pregroups and making things far too complicated
@peterrowlett gosh you're busy!
oh, the A History of Scotland that's on the iplayer at the moment is a second series! Fun!
@badmachinery what new solange album? it's not on amazon or spotify
£3.50 for digitalriver to "keep a copy of my download of windows 7" in case I need it again. Not totally sure how that works.
@badmachinery oh. That one's good
@badmachinery of course; they are a treasure of humanity, just like the Vedas - http://www.textfiles.com/underconstruction/
@peterrowlett could you remind me of the benefits of MathML wrt accessibility in e-assessment? I need to convince some lazy developers
composed a haiku yesterday, forgot to tweet it, performed it in my dream last night, nobody paid attention IN MY OWN DREAM
I did not know there was a moai in tynemouth
Watching the world's keenest Labrador play catch on the beach. It's inspiring; it should be the warmup act for Barack Obama
Previous Me was so much more talented than I am
Christian's cooking Christmas crinkle cookie cakes!
my front door was open all day!!!
the smell of the ready-meal carbonara in the oven is filling me with disgust. It really doesn't look appetising, but there's nothing else!
@JSlayerUK re itchy palm money: I've been trading in futures and derivatives of it and it all belongs to RBS now. sorry.
aaaaaahh, installing haskell packages on windows is so difficult!
longest game of Civ ever
So have they cancelled my metro or what? I even got to the station five minutes early today, and no dice
@Martinmagnusson no GoodBoy(x) and GoodGirl(y) predicates?
Rrrrrrr rrrrrr rrrrrrr aaaaaaaa aaaaa aaaaa rrrrrrrrrr! Bad day
I have cleared out Borders' maths section
uploading 3gb of videos... GCSE to A-Level maths students, watch this space.
@maanow can't believe how long that minutemath took me
just realised I did everything else on my to-do list but forgot to make lunch!
@maanow I did *not* notice that the triangles are right-angled! My solution is so much more complicated.
saw some hare krishna chuggers on northumberland street wearing berghauses. Fairly sure that's not allowed
what on earth are middlesbrough doing at 11th in the championship?
christian's cooking christmas crinkle cookie cakes encore
I just want to sleep in until the today programme finishes!
Today I'm carrying my home-baked cookies in to work in a tote bag I bought off an artist. Come and get me, boys.
70 RSJ maths videos uploaded, titled and described! Hooray!
Ah! There is my snow!
Charles Kennedy looks like ginger hitler
@MarcusduSautoy christmas twitter challenge - can you document the untangling of your christmas lights as a series of reidemeister moves?
could the four-colour theorem be applied to a many-santas scenario so no naughty child up late on christmas eve sees more than one st nick?
tried to be clever making gift tags; instead was disastrously un-so
Got 99 problems but lunch ain't one
@peterrowlett asymptote is a very nice package for getting graphics into latex, though a bit fiddly to set up on windows at first
2010
January
@AndyOvine that picture is brilliant!
Yeah I'm pretty good at maths
considering reusing my 1kg dairy milk wrapper as a document wallet
getting sick of top gear's weekly "you couldn't make it up!" moment
wheeee I love Michel Legrand's Paris Jazz Piano!
Maths aid is eerily quiet today
Moliere the film is some Grade A trash but I loves it
@aperfect not where YOU are. That's maaaaaaaaaaaths!
" lxgr'l'hyr=lxrlyr, or gr'l'h=rl. " Yep, that's what I do all day. No, I'm not a Klingon.
@JSlayerUK report it to the council and then shake with impotent rage.
FINISHED RIMLINGER!!!!!!!!!!
@aperfect posh new bbc recordings tickets site - http://tinyurl.com/yengu5y
the human condition: it is really difficult to look in someone else's utensils drawer and find the garlic crusher
oh dear, I think I want to switch to analysis. How can I do this without my supervisor noticing?
used my two free hours this morning to clean the house; now I'm too knackered to do anything else
wahey! I'm finally on the first page of google for "christian perfect"! take that, bible fans!
I am going loco trying to conserve kinetic energy in a model of a 2d elastic collision! Aaaaaaah!
complaining about a problem immediately leads to its solution - I had written the kinetic energy formula down wrong
there's this weird foam floating down the street...
I wish the uniqlock was the only thing in the world
Made enchiladas. Forgot to buy sour cream. Food-too-hot haiku.
Not happy about riding a scotrail train in Northumberland. Checked the back for a livestock carriage when I got off.
yep, pretty bored. Where are all the students?
@Gelada what open source computer assessment software would you prefer? I'm in a similar situation
today is like my anti-birthday. So far I've sprained my wrist and my car battery has died. What else could happen?
oh wow, mathjax is exactly what we need! http://tinyurl.com/yfzprsx
Going to see the ny met opera live broadcast at tyneside cinema.
crikey, sunderland really are bad at football, aren't they?
might start one of those harsh photoblogs, called "photos of groups of mathematicians". We are really not photogenic.
The man opposite me looks like a business man but is scrawling on a pad of paper like a complete nutso. Maybe he's just trying out a new pen
Mr accordion busker man, a tip: do not busk with your accordion within earshot of the other accordion busker man
the milling on copella bottle lids is quite sharp. #middleclassstruggle
@aperfect YES
there are not many logician-comedians: "Kleeneliness is next to Gödeliness"
@aperfect there is also wahaca
@peterrowlett must confess I saw it on Wikipedia and couldn't resist tweeting it. Got a few new followers as a result!
@jefferickson could you explain that one please? Are 'Pillsbury' topoi an actual thing or did you put that in to make the joke work?
making a directed semantic graph of the topics dealt with at maths-aid because I take my work too seriously
I've had a pretty fun night making this http://tinyurl.com/yahsvgn
I will call my first son Genre, pronounced "Henry". Thanks, TV!
SENOR DEMANDS NACHOS!!!
@standupmaths I'd say he looks beside himself with anger but I'm not sure how to tell for sure
"Has Elvis left the building? Location of rockstars in non-Euclidean geometries, C Perfect 2010" (inspired by @standupmaths)
I just saw two foxes run across the metro track! Real proper foxes with bushy fox tails and red fox hair and everything!
@kenfodder happy birthday!
just realised I've been reading the wrong paper for the past week! No wonder it didn't say anything like what it was supposed to.
@beefok if you need any help with diff eqs, I'm around
@JSlayerUK you might be low on electrolytes, or salt.
Somebody come to north shields tesco and stop me buying all the posh food please
when I picked this beef steak up I started salivating like a dog. Beef: better than bacon?
never try to explain cantor's diagonalisation argument to your software engineer father
From the looks one the faces of the dudes on the metro, I assumed nufc had lost. I will never understand the toon army
This jazz solo is a bit too real for me. I wonder if the other people on the metro can tell that my mind is being blown to pieces
@JSlayerUK that backslash is to get the LaTeX symbol for pi.
@standupmaths what age range are these kits aimed at?
oh crikey! that is a proper blizzard out there! what's going on?
February
just peeled a lot of my finger off
reading the worst possible explanation of what category theory is. My enthusiasm is waning
@aperfect fungible micro-products, integer-derived plus-selling. Automatic consensus?
oh lordy I had even forgotten that the TeX for 'times' is... \times !
@peterrowlett that's v interesting! I'm 'disabled' due to asperger's. I'm sure once the new diagnosed cohort go to uni, that % will increase
I've started a blog to write up notes about my research (and practice my LaTeX skills): http://bit.ly/9whxl7
new metric of indie hipness: proportion of shazam tagging attempts that fail
Fell victim to pernicious combinatorics in Boots. If I'd picked up a snack and another six-pack of tissues, it would've cost me a pound less
@rockhyrax does it need radiotherapy?
Mr Efficient is on the metro. He folds his paper in half twice, neatly. He puts it in his satchel in one movement. He wears a scarf.
@Bishnavitch sebastien tellier
Poserphones: noise-cancelling headphones that play the trendy music of the day outwards while you listen to Leona Lewis in total secrecy
Had breakfast at the serpentine bar and kitchen. Very nice!
@JSlayerUK oh wow, that story has it all!
doodle #1 http://brizzly.com/pic/1E5K
A thousand curses on Springer-Verlag and their ridiculous fees for downloadable papers!
yep, walked the wrong way down an escalator.
@brittneybean who collects subscription fees?
aha, a breakthrough! thesis not ruined after all!
@standupmaths say what you like about flog it and its ilk but they're the only format left not to have a "celebrity" version
@standupmaths clearly I don't watch enough daytime telly. I suppose there's been a celebrity edition of Jeremy Kyle as well?
New mathem-o-blog post: Serre's Graphs and Trees (http://bit.ly/caEnl4)
PhD Quest! Your command?
>write paper.
I'm sorry, you don't understand that
>read paper.
>write paper.
I'm sorry, you don't understand that!
@kenfodder "snail mail" always makes me think of Live 'n' Kicking on Saturday mornings
feeling very autistic today. threw a wobbly at the clingfilm because it split down the middle, then walked around the flat humming for a bit
why can't food wait until it's ready to eat before it smells so tasty?
bonza! found a cross country train going to Newcastle that's completely empty. so long, half term kids!
@aperfect nice! I might use that for the outreach website.
Mr Serious is on the metro. He wears a black coat with a reassuring texture. He puts on his black gloves. He likes how warm they are.
@aperfect HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh my god, a box!
@standupmaths wot no reynolds number joke?
crikey, 25% of this paper is the bibliography. Five pages!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah I can see the fnords aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
sign me up to www.girlsinwelliesteasingtheirdogwithabunchofseaweedonthebeach.com please
@aperfect you are your father's son
thank you, spotty youth in john Lewis, for finding me chopsticks just before closing time
@kenfodder so it *is* a G!
no way have I caught yet another cold. Have I offended my immune system?
I don't like listening to live recordings on my headphones because they have a reverb as if they're being played out loud
bought two boxes of tissues but left them on the metro. now there'll be a bomb scare *and* I'm still snotty!
@aperfect yep, that link doesn't work for me
@brittneybean because it's for kids and kids like colourful things, viz. the OLPC
chalking up some future maths in OneNote. Draw with pen, scroll with finger, clever handwriting recognition. It's the way of the future!
maybe burger king exploded? there are alarms and Northumberland street smells of beef
made sure not to forget my shopping bag this time; forgot my backpack instead
next time I need to fry an egg I will take it to the new bit of Eldon Square where it is hot enough for that to happen
@JSlayerUK you live in the wrong bit of the country!
@badmachinery BRAVO! I will pass this off as my own to the rest of the maths department on Monday
@peterrowlett @Gelada interesting podcast this week! I do find most episodes quite whispery though, could you put your best radio voice on?
@GreyAlien how do they stop? feet?
@dumbfirefly I've seen the same asked about agrarian society. not in glossy fashion magazines, though
Good tutoring today, student much brighter than expected. She sat module 3 after only three weeks, got an E. What's going on in schools?
New mathem-o-blog post: Computable Groups (http://cli.gs/GLTED)
just saw some class war happening. policeman stopped a guy just for wearing Kappa
@standupmaths I'm not too fond of that proof because shearing doesn't happen in real life, so it's not convincing without a bit more thought
@Gelada as a wireframe, yes. It's not too obvious the enclosed area stays the same though. Just an intuition thing, I suppose.
defined a \fgoagog command in LaTeX. Having a good day.
@standupmaths that book is following in the fine tradition of Byrne's translation of Euclid's elements: http://bit.ly/9kz7v6
@standupmaths that day could be the 1st of May if you order the taschen reprint
stuck in a (maths -> facebook -> maths -> twitter -> maths -> food) loop
@JSlayerUK oh my God that is brilliant! that news is like a late Christmas present from Schaden Claus
@alexbellos I will do that because I've just seen the American title and it is just as bad a pun as the British one
did too many things today. My mind is a blank and I am unable to do anything until bedtime.
this is a very interesting paper http://bit.ly/aH0s3z
@aperfect forgot about that! He should be your mascot
typing blue plaque locations into google maps, whose search is entirely failing me. Fairly sure I'm looking at nelson street, google!
@mathpunk I thought you had that game wrong in the interview, but thought saying so on twitter would be too snarky. Makes more sense now!
I've put the locations of all the blue plaques in Newcastle on google maps: http://bit.ly/brW9oP . I intend to photograph them all
waaaayyyyy canada! I expect the Queen to deliver a message of congratulation tomorrow
March
Why do Southern Electric need a minibus? New biofuel initiative?
some ill dog has been painting the pavements of tynemouth a rich brown
@JSlayerUK religious people are quite keen on them
@JSlayerUK religious people vote. I really think that's the top and bottom of it.
@alexbellos free book to the first person without any tweets to RT you?
@Gelada it has always annoyed me that the JUM has no abstracts. The maths might be unpublishable, but I might want to cite it all the same!
New mathem-o-blog post: Groups and the Grzegorczyk Hierarchy (http://bit.ly/bFslED)
@GreyAlien The Pru deal and the fact the tories aren't going to win the election. The Today programme told me so, so it must be true
@alexbellos another vote for John Conway, didn't think about it for too long though
@JSlayerUK and can you believe some people press the lift button more than once even though it doesn't help? I bet that winds you right up!
Micro Chips! I am twelve again
@standupmaths I'm sure there's a niche for a channel with 37-minute programmes so it's always out of phase with other channels' ad breaks
@peterrowlett I can see it
wow, £4.99 for a thermos bottle but £34.99 if I want hannah montana on it. I think I can tell what my parenting style will be.
Swype is a very nice alternative keyboard for android. Very fast!
Newcastle have a goal difference of 40. That is insane.
still haven't forgiven the person who renamed Toppers to Frosted Wheats
@aperfect nice picture
Very good article - RT @Math_Bits: What were Einstein and Gödel talking about? http://bit.ly/cZcZV2
wahey, got JMEs working in SCORM! Took me a day, after waiting since November for the specs.
some element of what I ate today has poisoned me
going to the toilet with a feeling of trepidation is no way to live
new f1 season, IPL starting, and a new cabinet magazine! A relatively good time to be ill, really.
wow, I've lost almost a stone since I (1) started taking the stairs instead of the lift and (2) caught gastroenteritis
hah! West Gate Community College is now called 'Excelsior Academy'! Was Mr Wakelam involved?
.@mathematicsprof forget all that, I'm preparing for one big blow-out megaparty in Graham's Year
@Gelada I'm sure we can find a home for it at the Newcastle Uni maths department
@Gelada Maybe get in touch with our MathSoc - http://bit.ly/cinjgP
@brittneybean I imagine Florida is full of those now
Dead wasp on the pavement.that's wrong in a couple of ways
@aperfect what they mean is he didn't attack a WPC
@JSlayerUK stage left or your left? Ken might be offended!
ah, there it is! http://bit.ly/9PyClM "dangerous knowledge" - superb documentary about cantor and infinity and so on
what do you do when your phone has failed three times to send a message saying, "never mind"?
el Michels Affair sounds far too much like Menahen Street Band
making all kinds of noises about these burgers
@aperfect more to the point, who even remembers domain names any more?
just noticed that gazza is holding a bottle of broon in the mural at monument metro. How unfortunate.
oh no, now the bad juju is messing with the TV signal! This must be killing me somehow
Dreamt last night that I had a new kitchen from john lewis. It was beautiful!
The Ball With the Scary Noise In It is now an un-toy according to the dog. He walked right over it and refuses to acknowledge its existence
@fumbleweeds hello, who are you?
@fumbleweeds he's married! Crikey! Nice to meet you, and so on. Thanks re. feeds
@mathpunk at least you can say it's not cooperating today, and not at various moments sprinkled throughout history
it's only 9am and I've already heard the phrase "hot and cold running chicks" twice
I must find a way to become a member of the Mathematical Society of Traffic Flow
@brittneybean that sounds like the kind of event rolling news channels turn up to
the jazz soundtrack to my life has returned! Today will go pleasingly, hep cats
oh good god, "lizzie and sarah" is absolutely the most harrowing comedy programme I have ever seen. My perfect day is ruined already!
haven't heard of most of them, oh dear! RT @nulibsage: Most influential British women in history of science http://bit.ly/d3iWLt
@standupmaths how do I know you're not the person who stole Matt's phone and the password hasn't in fact been changed?
@brittneybean Nokia bh-501 - http://bit.ly/b227wa I like them a lot but I am not an audiophile. They work with every device I've tried.
@divbyzero the princeton companion to mathematics has a very good (and long) article about maths and music, fi you can get hold of a copy
Things I am tired of seeing in "maths art": the fibonacci series, the golden ratio, mobius strips, klein bottles. Think of something new!
@aperfect which makes it not even maths
@Gelada "there are some animations here" in the caption for the polytope image doesn't have a link attached - shouldn't there be one?
There are many be-flat-capped men pacing around the station. Something's up, but what?
@aperfect yeah that's my new vampire weekend tribute band
@Gelada very good article, I should have said as well!
@badmachinery milliners make hats
Had loads of fun making origami prisms and pyramids to help my tutee with geometry
@badmachinery that kind of joke is why you are the UK's top professional web cartoonist. All is forgiven!
I've been trying all day to procrastinate by chatting and nobody has co-operated!
@nulibsage did rather better on that one thanks. No, I didn't know about Elizabeth Garrett Anderson, and that's what made me remark
Fog is optical communism
@standupmaths I'm sure the barbican is ripe for some topology or graph theory puzzles: pick a random visible walkway then try to get there.
YES PLEASE NEXUS please do extend the metro to washington!
@rockhyrax turnitin?
@brittneybean because the only content anyone would conceivably pay for is editorial and investigative pieces - breaking news is everywhere
@JSlayerUK Papal infallibility only applies to ex cathedra statements, ie ones where he specifically says "This is for reals yo"
@JSlayerUK PS 'nonce' is a horrible word
@trackinthebox don't share your taste most of the time, but I really like Thomas Tantrum in that list.
@fumbleweeds does it give the same results for everybody?
was forcing myself to keep working and do a 9 to 5, until I realised I started at 7. Free, free, finally free!
why do girls in burger places always give me a bigger burger than the one I ordered?
@nilium feel sorry about what?
Seagulls in clear morning light giving me flashbacks of the bbc four ident
Mathsy arts beyond the usual fibonacci rubbish (after the first 10 or so, at least) - really cool stuff http://bit.ly/cobH4F
@JSlayerUK I am, but I don't think where I am is interesting information
"Eggs are... just a brainwave, aren't they?" - Mum
April
@NewcastleCC was there ever any truth in that civic centre rabbits story?
My nana looks like Little Miss Stalin in that coat
@NewcastleCC thanks, all my colleagues in the maths department have been inviting me to the facebook group. You'd think they'd know better!
Just realized I have a philosophical objection to -54 being a number
I've started a public collection of interesting maths finds on Mendeley - http://bit.ly/9o2a6Q
@alexbellos I bought my non-mathematician mum your book for her birthday and she says it is very good and accessible. Well done!
I have joined the dog in being scared of the washing machine
New mathem-o-blog post: Interesting papers collection (http://bit.ly/baPzeD)
the Tory Action Squad has been deployed to tynemouth metro station. Will they start a social enterprise to pick up the discarded leaflets?
@standupmaths mathematicians who live on-campus make up a non-commutative group
the BBC site invites me to "watch Jeremy Vine's intro" or "start swinging" - I always knew he looked the type
my mathem-o-relative (Hazel Perfect) has an Erdos number of 2! Now I just need to track her down and co-author a paper and all will be super
gosh it's warm!
@mathpunk what would that involve?
@mathpunk so you'd want a git repository with a nice frontend that does word/latex/etc. ?
so domino's hot pizzas are actually hot now. At least they don't give me the squirties any more
Saw mr lomas on the street. He didn't recognise me. Disappointed.
@brittneybean become one of us! all you have to do is answer 20 inane questions about pub etiquette and swear allegiance to an old german
@aperfect ahhhh wowwww that looks good!
@aperfect went well, told some jokes
how is Morning OJ meant to cohabit with Morning Toothbrushing?
Time to use the services of Mr Shavington-Smyth; my chin wants to enjoy the sunny weather.
oh gosh this looks useful: MathOnline — a compendium of free online mathematical references http://bit.ly/czEybK
@mendeley_com does there exist an RSS feed of all my shared collections?
having major rotation/reflection issues with printing this PDF. I want to make an A5 booklet, but learn not from my mistakes each printing.
this rain smells lovely! is the volcano responsible? Full of volcanicity! http://bit.ly/c3HEwQ
I think the old man two doors up fancies me
@kenfodder I imagine you writing these tweets in a room occupied by yourself and one other person.
must stop watching music videos of pretty singers on youtube. Must write maths instead. I think that's how I want my life to be, I think.
Maths Improv sessions on google wave: you ask questions, I write maths. Does that sound fun?
@rockhyrax tweed and elbow pads
@peterrowlett I wish I could attend that first one, I've been trying to use tablet pcs in teaching for years
oh yes, check out the titles available on the co-op registration form: http://bit.ly/9CImXr
@brittneybean Are you even kidding? That is an awful name for one of the best things about childhood
@rockhyrax woolly jumpers seem to be the unisex uniform of choice for mathematicians. Think Boden.
@rockhyrax you are going to classier maths conferences than I am. Maybe I will raise the tone next time round with a zoot suit.
@rockhyrax wearing a zoot suit is one of those ambitions I will never dare fulfil. On reflection, no it would not raise the tone.
just pulled out a snot with the consistency of marmalade.
I can see the fnords and they are in EDI's code! It displays '3*3' as '33'!! INCONCEIVABLE!
I hereby resign my membership of the set of people who can make a caesar salad without completely messing it up
I wonder how the pilot of the Enola Gay felt about becoming the killingest person ever
Kant: "what is beauty?" --- cp: "www.uniqlock.jp"
wow a real turing machine - http://bit.ly/97yICp
but the google ads were "toys for autistic toddlers"??
@Htbaa works for me. Is this pursuant to the thing about a modules listing on the bb.com forums?
@JSlayerUK it is only newspaper tycoons who do that. There are plenty of people in the world for you!
had a dream I went back to school and in assembly they did a big song and dance number about the times rich list. What was that bout?
I know dockers make 36 leg trousers because I own two pairs. So why does their site not go beyond 32L?
@peterrowlett that's exactly the kind of title that gets me funny looks when I explain what I do to non-mathematicians
@AndyOvine sounds like you had a nice day
@MathJax I'm using MathJax and the badge on http://bit.ly/9whxl7
@MathJax cool! I'm making an online exam system using mathjax for newcastle uni as well, but that isn't ready yet. WP was v easy to set up.
@badmachinery try "renard"
I think I might buy some paint
left-handed smileys are the devil's work. #selfhatingsinistromanualist
@trackinthebox I'm not sure if "Boots" by Nancy Sinatra counts, because it is a classy tune
@aperfect you're blogging it wrong
Just gave my seat to an old lady. Forgot that I'm going the long way round the metro line. Hope she gets off soon
hooray, finally! RT @MendeleySupport: ...Lots of little tweaks, but best of all, a new search feature for our catalog: http://bit.ly/d8BaG0
@JSlayerUK I have the same thing but with rocket cars. With me I think it's that I have no presence of mind, so they make me stop and look.
super! my tutee lost the memory stick with all her coursework on it, so I don't have to tutor her today!
square spaghetti is confusing me :(
@nulibsage I don't understand the e-shelf e-books thing. When it says the library will be charged for a loan, will that be passed on to me?
convinced Bill I needed to rewrite most of our code. Not sure how he'll react when I tell him we only need to change like two things
Borrowed a Sony Reader from the library. It is the future, as seen from the 1980s.
May
Watching armida at the tyneside with my nana. I've never been in a room with so many old people. I can't stand Renee Fleming either!
Well, the ballet bit was good. Only another hour and a half to go!
This blackbird is breaking out the freshest beats to find a mate
@divbyzero graphviz is pretty easy to get into.
@rockhyrax that seems to be what they've defined it to be: http://bit.ly/9JQvDk
@rockhyrax actually, wikipedia is more definitive in re the definition: http://bit.ly/biZb0v
yep so I'm drawing deep-sea cowboys and it is like the best thing I've thought of this year
Yep, these new trousers are pretty special
@kenfodder truth.
@kenfodder pate is addictive
@brittneybean it looks like the london skyline sticker from www.hu2.com , but it's slightly different. I wonder where they got it?
@princesszelda you're getting less picky, yesterday there were like three other criteria. #randomtwitterheckle
Fat flute man has upgraded to a clarinet, and is playing a topical tune - "I can see clearly now the rain has gone"
Is fat flute man's clarinet purchase a green shoot if recovery? Is the recession over? Should I vote Labour tomorrow after all?
@ColinTheMathmo I'm going to the IMA thing and I've registered for mathsjam, but £150 is a bit much - will there be any help for students?
@aperfect that is the single cleverest thing I have seen today, and I'm in the maths department
heading for a third consecutive weekend spent visiting Alnwick
@JSlayerUK tl;dr
there's a leak in the tyne tunnel.. oh goooood, the tories are ruining Britain already!
my mathem-o-blog is now at http://checkmyworking.com
to those interested: have a look at my clever web maths exam thing at http://is.gd/c0csr (still in development)
@quarklet ah yes, so I do. Thanks!
too many Toppers, not enough milk. #stupidsunday
today's Bad Machinery is genius
Sat next to a tiny woman on a small bench. Too early for my brain to cope. Feel like Gulliver
Ok, one person taking their hamster on the metro is odd, but two is a pattern. What's up?
@rockhyrax do such things happen? Does the Big Lottery Fund pay for a massive wheel they can all run in?
in the Brave New Tory Future, I might take up swearing
Opening a sweepstakes on first tory outrage. My bet - disbandment of guide dogs for the blind, national service for all pet dogs instead.
didn't plan the run-up to exam season well; now eating five meals a day to catch up. My role-model is "Hunter" from 90s gladiators.
the SAgE survey has an "agree/disagree/etc" section with a final question where I can make up my own statement to agree with. "I like dogs"?
@theyellowstereo just in time for my emusic subscription renewing! I like the new post layout, too
I bet leather elbow patches would give me a sufficient look of authority to disperse these King's students crowding the platform. Oh well.
is anyone going to the Late Shows?
@Bishnavitch to roots and wings? What's the plan, I couldn't work out from facebook
@JSlayerUK send it to cp
@Gelada this mathematician doesn't know it happened!
The clockword puzzlers are on the metro. They have matching pens and spectacles. Neither one has solved number 11 ('emblem')
@stewartandco how much are the BBQs? I've moved away from jesmond but there's no good butcher here so might come back on a sunny day
New mathem-o-blog post: The computability of a fgoagog (intro) (http://bit.ly/bt49bX)
why does Lui's only start serving breakfast at 9am? I'm hungry now and I need to be in town by 9! A posh bacon roll would have done nicely
"New Labour isn't new any more. What I'm interested in is next Labour. Blairites, Brownites, that's past" - David Miliband is next grammar
@MathJax I can't get \nmid to work in beta 2. It's in AMSsymbols.js, but using it gives an error
@rockhyrax maybe it was an old bee, and it kept forgetting what it came in for. Put out a thimbleful of horlicks and see if it takes a sip
maths sock! http://is.gd/cbz2B
today I have eaten only tomato soup, coca cola, and pepperoni pizza. It's the worst my mouth has ever felt.
thanks to google there are no more neologisms. Well, "increasative" hasn't been used in any of my citations, so I can coin it in this paper
Whoops, stopped in the middle of tesco to prove a lemma. Not sure how long I was stood there, but it seems to have stopped raining.
@peterrowlett fibonacci satire! http://is.gd/cd0vr
@brittneybean they probably don't sell enough ads to do precise targeting yet
@JSlayerUK a = bc + r ; b = cd + s, etc. etc. etc.
@MathJax no I don't, because I'm stupid. Thanks!
@rockhyrax I find it satisfying when wild animals appear more than once. It's like they're real things and not just anonymous automata
@peterrowlett it was ok. I wasn't really there long enough to get the most out of it. Met a few people, but not sure I'll go next year
@Bishnavitch generic skater tweet day?
Three minutes and counting since my code started computing the next prime after 7. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing.
@rockhyrax I'm building all computable functions up from three primitives - zero, successor, projection. Working towards http://is.gd/cgtWv
Advanced selection methods will produce most virile being in universe: http://is.gd/cguew . We're all (going to be) screwed!
@standupmaths I'm laughing but it is a despairing laugh. That's just awful.
This woman has the biggest possible nose. A caricaturist would draw it very small because going bigger just wouldn't look any different
@rockhyrax it did, but I haven't tried the one after that yet. I might cheat a bit just so I can get the first hundred primes before I die
@rockhyrax I need to encode lists using Godel numbers, which relies on prime factorisations.
yowza, the hot stuff chilli company weren't joking! Trying to think of ways to go to the toilet without touching my winkle now.
@princesszelda why are you thinking about make up at six in the morning?
15,000 proverbs about women from around the world: http://is.gd/ciJse . Some are really pleasant, others are rather mean
At the RHS gardens near harrogate, wearing a Panama hat and deciding to get an allotment. I'm like Benjamin Button with lifestyle choices
@GreyAlien lots of chiasmus in your tweets lately. Appreciated!
In gbk!!!!!
went to a different country today - Yorkshire. Feel inadequate and provincial now
cleaned my patio very thoroughly and swept all the old leaves away, and now my neighbour's just thrown their clippings over the wall. Poo.
@alexbellos so jealous! It is my life's ambition to own one, and they're only getting rarer
@JSlayerUK well, I never had MMR. Is that anecdotal enough to persuade you?
my new can opener is magic. I don't like having paranormal kitchen utensils. It opened a can and I don't know how it did it and I'm scared.
@rockhyrax aww, I could've got a Zuul reference in, couldn't I? Phooey!
just found out I bought two 3-litre bottles of Summer Fruits squash instead of apple and blackcurrant because I'm colourblind. Might die.
@alexbellos extremely long metafilter thread about your Tuesday boy article: http://bit.ly/aAyvl7
@divbyzero so you have to be at the right place at the right time for the Klein bottle opener to work?
@nususteam how are the recycling percentages worked out?
@Gelada it's more like maths gives a very satisfying definition of truth
@Gelada well, it's better than "feely" truth. The idea that you can say "I know this fact, so what else do I know as a consequence"? is good
@rockhyrax so what is the deal with hyraces?
@peterrowlett have a play about with xThink Calculator: http://bit.ly/cfkeui . Windows 7 does maths input in Word as well if you've got it.
June
My flat has eccentric light fittings. Who knows where to get a lightbulb that looks like an onion with Marge Simpson's hairdo? It's dark :(
@rockhyrax sleep in on leap days? If there's an extra day, one should be able to waive the right to use it.
exam runtime is now under 2000 lines! Hooray for simple code! Boo to whatever the other guy was trying to do!
@brittneybean so I looked up the paper that's based on, and I thought "their maths is very bad", and then I saw it was written by economists
it's possible that Janelle Monae is the best woman. Initial assessments point towards yes http://is.gd/cA0mp
@JSlayerUK does it count as part of the Palace?
@JSlayerUK whoops, that was what I was going to have tonight. Maybe I'm a bit depressed though
@JSlayerUK I agree 120%. The extra 20% is because Alice Lowe has joined the cast and she is so nice
I have learned tonight: proper cajun seasoning is in no way a substitute for fajita spices; old el paso guacamole tastes like late trains
@rockhyrax trains that arrive late - disappointing, but just what you expect, really
@standupmaths sudoku *is* the 'more than' puzzle - it used to be all crosswords
@aperfect that logo is very bad, and what they do to it further down the page is worse
who has Red Dead Redemption for the xbox? This internet ain't big enough for all of us, let's have a shootout tonight.
@richieb85 my gamertag is ChristianP, I will be playing online later
the thing that EDI have spent two years not knowing how to do I have just done in 2 hours! MY MIND IS EXPLODING DUE TO TOO MUCH GENIUS
@rockhyrax EDI are the company up in Scotland we're working with, making online maths exams using SCORM. I've made randomised questions work
@rockhyrax we don't even get round people looking at the answers in the page source! The plan is to have locked-down PCs for real exams.
@rockhyrax no, C/Basic-like syntax. That was the other clever thing I did earlier in the year! It renders as latex though, through mathjax
mathematicians: how do you think one should LaTeX an integer times a fraction? 3 \times \frac{1}{2}, or, 3(\frac{1}{2}), or what?
@rockhyrax still didn't understand the hyrax love, but now remember koalas have same effect on me. Might go and find my Koala Kate cassette
@rockhyrax this http://is.gd/cGcFH (unhelpful link). My dad brought it back fro Oz when I was tiny. It was my favourite cassette!
@badmachinery the whole time this story's been on I didn't realise "good boy" could refer to a dog! You've made this maths phd feel v.stupid
@rockhyrax I can't in good faith join your group, can't see the appeal of hyraces, esp. compared to koalas. Also I can't write on your wall?
@brittneybean @aperfect I await the arrival of the first hands-free video call kit
@rockhyrax well, it's greek, and 'hyraces' got past peer review: http://bit.ly/biINom
@rockhyrax English is changing - viz. 'indexes' vs 'indices' is 3.6m to 2m on google scholar. Scholars are writing this! Scholars!
@rockhyrax PS no clever retorts about the verb 'index'
@rockhyrax men, geese and people everywhere are insulted!
sausage beans sausage beans sausage beans SAUSAGE BEANS SAUSAGE BEANS
@aperfect that looks creepy just referring to dad as @eqdynamics. Twitter should automatically rewrite '@dad' to your dad's actual username
considering writing "EDI are bad at everything" in morse code using tabs and spaces somewhere in my sourcecode.
looking back, three jacket potatoes topped with a can of tuna, a lot of cheese and three rashers of bacon was never a realistic proposition
@peterrowlett what do you know about adaptive assessment in online exams? That's my project next year for this SCORM thing at Newcastle
@peterrowlett I think so. We might be gathering some people together to discuss standards. I can't invite you, but would you be interested?
@peterrowlett okie doke, kein Problem. Have I shown you what I'm making? Example at http://is.gd/cKyZU - does that interest you?
@ColinTheMathmo that's really interesting!
Sitting in on Robin Johnson recording revision videos. Never meet your heroes.
Confused a foreigner on the metro. To be fair, he confused me first. I think he got off at the right stop, so it was karma-neutral.
@EATng does the foodie walk start at the castle keep behind the cathedral? My mum's convinced it starts at the civic centre
@alexbellos tell him to sort out the camerawork in his video lectures. We've been watching his quantum computing series in our seminars
ahhh itv commentator man don't talk about the "german gene kicking in" when they start winning, especially not when the player is polish
@aperfect truth spoken to twitter
Michael Schumacher needs a visit from Supernanny
gosh, it might be time to download a matmos album. Especially as emusicsmas is two days away and I still have 14 downloads.
@JSlayerUK you're winding yourself up. Distract yourself - compose a limerick about lembit opik, factorise a big number, take deep breaths
♺ @qikipedia: Today's B word: Beckets. The little loops on a pair of trousers or a raincoat for a belt to pass through
@brittneybean very slick! but: the maths on crops seems odd, and I didn't build a road properly in the tutorial but it carried on anyway
@brittneybean refreshed the page and it got stuck in an infinite loop of clouds when I clicked "start playing"
I have exactly 13000 emails in my inbox! I will celebrate with Frosties
turning the volume up for a good song, walking across the room to do some work, a bad song comes on after: unfortunate.
using my telephone voice to comment on the LRB blog
@standupmaths for the foreseeable future, non-checked shirts are not allowed, by order of the management
I have found the one phrase, out of all possible phrases, most likely to amuse a 12-year-old: "sperm whale faeces absorb gas"
@JSlayerUK oh, so true! You are like a modern day Peter Kay. Please tell me about more things I remember so I can laugh!
@JSlayerUK I didn't have enough characters left to say not sarcastic! It genuinely did make me laugh
@GreyAlien what do you recommend for "unpronounceable" and "unspellable"?
@GreyAlien the correct answer was, "pretend you're Irish"
@brittneybean your flattr button on trackinthebox says "error"
Walking behind a trendier version of me. This isn't looking good. Oh, he's stopped to look at some fashionable clothes. The gap is growing!
@JSlayerUK which app? beebplayer?
someone call BP and tell them to forget about underwater robots - what I just dropped in the toilet will solve their problem
@brittneybean I thought that site was about the NUFC player and got very confused.
@alexbellos I'd never thought of using football matches to check the birthday paradox. It's almost exactly the right no of people!
would I regret buying one of these paper birds? http://is.gd/cWChn
@aperfect I don't know, previous bird-themed purchases have provided satisfaction
why did I even bother buying cheap Tesco soup?
@alexbellos I'm not a statistician, but analysing shared birthdays after the first round of group games will cause educative problems
the Tories' impression of what is fair is vastly different to mine
about to make it rain on www.alternativemeats.co.uk
@NUSusTeam so it's something like recycled tonnes as a percentage of recyclable tonnes, or as a percentage of total waste?
taking a shower shouldn't push the limits of perception, but every morning deciding how hot to make it prompts a metaphysical conundrum
@JohnChrisJames good luck JJ! Will you be uploading pictures anywhere?
hoeren Sie mir und legen Sie Ihre Sombreros auf: BURRITOZEIT BEGINNT JETZT
@JSlayerUK eat food until there is space in the fridge for the cake
spent two hours shooting hundreds of federales on the xbox only for some 'dude' to shoot me in the face seconds before I got the achievement
25!!! ♺ @BBCWeatherNorth: Temperatures up to 25C/77F by Sunday. Han B
A chocolatier has opened on the high street next to the working men's club. Very posh! Will try some when I get back from my walk.
ok amazon, if you insist, I will buy the Taschen edition of Byrne's Euclid for 40% less than the RRP.
@Bishnavitch fight the good fight
@hellobuglers to be fair Capello was hiding tactical advice in one of their clues: "Rasta friend greets Pauline's son (4-3-3)"
@brittneybean cripes, that sounds like something out of the 19th century!
@Bishnavitch what time does the film start? Having dinner with my mum tonight
@Bishnavitch doesn't matter, I've now got to get my own dinner so will be at yours at 8:30. Can I use your parking space?
@Bishnavitch I'm outside your flat!
@brittneybean I stared at the iwi logo too long and now it looks like the dude on the right is giving a huge backhand slap to the left guy
It's here! http://tweetphoto.com/29834585
@standupmaths aah! I just found out the word for that a few days ago and in a massive case of irony I've completely forgotten it!
Why have I had a Rae Spoon song stuck in my head for two days? I don't even know the words, just some of the vowels
oh man it's all going right for me right now! Chile con queso, SCORM object reporting scores properly, theorem proved, cowboys shot. Fab!
@rockhyrax watermark, that's the ticket
July
The entertainer is on the metro. He goes "ding!" when the train does. Everybody is laughing. What a guy.
@fumbleweeds what are cereal boxes made of over there? I have literally never had this problem.
@rockhyrax the latter
grigory perelman got 99 problems but the poincare conjecture ain't one
@rockhyrax you're coming round, I knew you would!
@aperfect apparently you need to go and see this http://www.twitvid.com/VE0Q3
writing latex on the patio. It isn't really working for me.
so I'm supporting Germany but I don't like ozil's face. What to do?
@aperfect OH?
@rockhyrax yes, but I forgot to close an environment and now my deck chair is all wet :(
What kind of lazy barber is closed on a Monday? I'm starting to look like cousin It
switched my paper to sans-serif. Not sure how my supervisor will react, but I'm prepared to fight for it.
@JSlayerUK no, they get one vote which will decide the winner. Or, everyone gets candidates-1 votes, winners assumed to stay with same party
@JSlayerUK hup Holland hup!!!
Made the correct choice re coming home before the rain really starts
somebody, like, lunge at me with a knife while explaining the definition of nilpotent to me so it sticks in my memory this time
Another thing only emotional trauma will imprint on my memory is the order of the junctions on the A184
@rockhyrax so not radically different from the current situation
the whole chain of events leading to me sitting down to eat my dinner in front of the football has failed to happen. I'm hungry and confused
@peterrowlett haven't read this but here you go http://arxiv.org/abs/0803.0150
@rockhyrax it certainly makes them drawees if they ever do open again
@MarcusduSautoy hey! you! marcus! we have got to talk / your convoluted verse structure / tends to prose as the length of the poem increases
@MarcusduSautoy exactly 140 characters, or almost rhymes if you change start to "er, dork/ author!" but I didn't want to call you a dork
@MarcusduSautoy never mind, just noticed I missed out the 3. Will stop spamming you now.
@aperfect is that where those dirigible penguins were?
The rain has made the midgies hatch, and this spider has caught so many I worry it hasn't git enough brains to know when to stop eating
ok real mathematicians, forget pi day, we can celebrate pigeon-hole day! http://is.gd/dndrG
"The gourmet chocolate pizza company" - you couldn't make it up! It's the middle classes gone mad!
@Htbaa are you just trying to wear out your hash key?
@alexbellos aha! time for me to dig this up: http://is.gd/drwLS I find it very useful as an explanation of the general idea
@brittneybean http://is.gd/drBZt
take that, bag of cookies! There was only room for one of us in this town, but happily there was room for all of you in my tummy
@nulibsage I have yet to encounter a Springer article in a journal the uni has subscribed to. Are they just too expensive?
"tarski" and "high school algebra problem" is the biggest juxtaposition in maths I can think of http://tinyurl.com/3898t45
@GreyAlien oh no! I even tried telling facebook I was a girl to get rid of the tacky dating ads. Is there no safe configuration?
@Gelada @standupmaths does hornby sound enough like corby to make the obvious pun?
@nulibsage no, I know which journals I want, but we don't subscribe to them!
New mathem-o-blog post: Computable categories (http://bit.ly/cmjjvs)
@nulibsage I haven't been keeping a list, but "lecture notes in computer science" (1980) was the last one
@Htbaa it's good to see he's reaching out to foreigners? That's a first step?
@Electrokittie but Saturday Saturday Saturday!!!
@Electrokittie !!! That is a brilliant idea
@Htbaa yeah, we banned him from coming over here
@Htbaa he's got one thing going for him, that his name being on the news taught me how the Dutch pronounce the letter G
@rockhyrax well, the story's quite interesting, actually...
New mathem-o-blog post: Lists and finite trees are $E_3$ (http://bit.ly/a1gKPQ)
ploughing through my unfinished blog posts because I am so done with pregroups
@JSlayerUK last time I had that done, I met an old school friend on the street afterwards. It's very hard to not look crazy in that state
@aperfect genetically, I am glad I only got autism and not hayfever from mum and dad
@fatfieldfoodie bought streaky bacon 2 for 1, and some posh bbq sauces. I think I was too early, some stands were empty
@JSlayerUK woooooow, those are really good!
I have basically no decisions to make about what to eat for the next week or so
@Alternativemeat bbq yesterday was a big success. Impala sausages were the consensus favourite, but I didn't get any!
opulence: using charbonnel et walker and clotted cream ice cream to make a chocolate milkshake
should I make a mockery of amazon prime by ordering a 79p box of chalk to be delivered tomorrow by special delivery? Tempted!
@GreyAlien that was the temptation! Such enormous pointlessness is like performance art
@rockhyrax I used no sugar. Is that something you're meant to do? I just sort of blended everything together and it was ok, I suppose.
Fol Chen's "In Ruins" sounds like the intro theme to a totally kickin' 80s movie
@JSlayerUK that puts you one up on Dick Cheney
aaaaaahhh! Why do we not subscribe to the journal of mathematical sciences?! WE'RE A MATHS DEPARTMENT
@Amy1306 at least you're not male
New mathem-o-blog post: Infinite trees are $E_3$ (maybe) (http://bit.ly/9l94cP)
@rockhyrax YES. I have to start one of those now.
came into uni to be productive; left my usb stick at home; sheesh
finished Limbo. Good, but not worth a tenner
@Bishnavitch potentially, if it's a late-ish showing
@peterrowlett now I want to make a Magic Pi picture. Maybe it could be a mobius strip, for full maths art cliche effect.
for the first time since the Little Ice Age, my flat is warmer than the air outside it
If this old man was a transformer his name would be Insane-o-plex and his special power would be creeping me out
Time for Jardine's cowboy kettle chilli yesssssss
@GreyAlien ahh, I'd always wondered about that! oil change places are everywhere in the US
In mourning for Tanfastic, the shop with the best name
@aperfect god damn it I made that joke last weekend!
@aperfect in front of bish, discussing wraps
I have had to deplete my Strategic Reserve of pound coins because domino's isn't taking card payment. I might regret this.
@JSlayerUK you don't need people, you need Soupy Norman
just realised last letter of my bank password needs to be a repeat because it only appears in the last box, so could be deduced
@rockhyrax much more mundane - my wallet doesn't have a coins bit, but I buy a sandwich every day for lunch, so pounds accumulate
@JSlayerUK if you're considering it, don't bother with Gordon Ramsey's Plane Food. It's only so-so.
@alexbellos I think so; that rings a bell... (pun ENTIRELY intended)
@rockhyrax what's going on, are you playing a mad combinatoric variant of musical chairs?
the best thing ever! RT @divbyzero: RT @pickover: Please enjoy this shiny fractal cow. http://bit.ly/cvCEDA
people who drive in the middle lane are why democracy can never work
Misery Bear has a day off http://youtu.be/t3e9rc1PueI
August
@beefok no! functional please!
@beefok anon functions alone are worthwhile but haskell is like writing pure maths. Lots of clever optimisations can be done by FP compilers
@ColinTheMathmo it was underneath a Dan Brown book. That was the bit I found hardest to believe in the whole episode
This woman's handbag looks like the oogie boogie man.
and I thought "Genuine all-over tan 'an impossibility'" was going to be an application of the hairy ball theorem http://tinyurl.com/25av34j
@brittneybean doesn't seem to work. After I click play, nothing happens
Making eye contact with people would be a lot easier if I could tell when they are making eye contact with me
@fumbleweeds I'll swap you. It's all overcast and horrible here. I had the heating on this morning!
The rabbits in the park are so bad at hiding. Where have the birds of prey gone?
if Oliver Byrne had had access to a 70s graphics terminal, he might have made this http://bit.ly/cwyoHW (@alexbellos)
@brittneybean giraffe is mine, hands off. On my wall it would say without words, "a tall man lives here, but don't worry, he's into cuddles"
@brittneybean I'm ok with that as long as his middle name is Raphael, so his rapper name would be G-Raf.
@brittneybean every now and then I consider complaining about a song but then I get a sense of perspective and do something worthwhile
my computer's failing in a very cinematic way - the sound is going all mechanical, graphics are jumbled up, but nothing has stopped working
@peterrowlett you could mention the release of MathJax, which will help maths on the web a lot. It's sponsored by the AMS, Elsevier, etc.
catching up on five years of PC games. Where to start?
@Bishnavitch curry. What's wrong with you, that's not a hard choice.
@GreyAlien that was the last game I bought!
@alexbellos if you can check an answer to a question in not too long, does that mean that you can find the answer in a similar timescale?
Two women, both wearing weird asymmetric work trousers but normal casual tops, waiting for the metro. What?
@alexbellos yes P = probs s.t. solns can be found in poly time, NP probs s.t. solns can be checked in poly time. P is in NP, but is NP in P?
@alexbellos oh dear. @standupmaths 's job is safe.
@brittneybean apart from the super mario bros theme, which is the achievement of our age, Outcast had a good score
@brittneybean ahhh I take it back! I forgot Monkey Island! http://bit.ly/dmURvO
@aperfect that's cheating, it's film music!
@aperfect ok, I concede. Can't spend time arguing, busy looking for a lynx emulator
@aperfect "even the Guardian"?!
fixed three really small bugs today, good work. Now I will play games until my eyes have a serviceable map of q3dm17 imprinted on them
going to make a sarky comment on a facebook post but can't find the crucial corroborating evidence to back it up. Victorian txtspeak anyone?
to expand: fairly sure it was a metafilter post about txtspeak-like abbreviations in wide use in 18/19th C letters, with famous examples
Yes! The champion difficulty space in Eldon garden multi-storey was free. There should be an Xbox achievement for using it
me to Max: "don't wear shoes, dog!" Where does he get his ideas from?
@brittneybean the Naked and Famous: Larry Flynt has that Venn diagram on a stained glass window in his office
@MathJax ah! can fonts be stored on a separate server and not break cross-site scripting rules? that helps a lot!
@Bishnavitch I thought I had fast-forwarded five year and I had become a bigoted professor. Is Dr Christian off that street doctors thing?
@aperfect yes
The dog is suspiciously cooperative today, and I doubt that my lectures on the value of collaboration were what turned him
@GreyAlien because the IR light is weaker, so by pressing harder we're holding it down for longer, so light has greater chance of being seen
@GreyAlien depending on the remote, the contact on the button could also be flaky
a search engine for recipe videos: http://cookblast.com/
tomorrow we'll be talking about 2010's top painted rodents in the Art Rat Chart Chat #newcultureshowsegments
someone's subscribing to my Interesting Esoterica maths collection on Mendeley! Now I feel pressure to find more papers
@divbyzero have a look at www.mathjax.org - yeah it isn't built in to the browser but it's ace and supports all of amsmath
@trackinthebox your emails have had  characters littered about them for the past few days
@brittneybean windows live mail. Good point - they're not there on the web interface
I lost my place while cleaning my teeth and ended up just brushing teeth at random until it felt like two minutes had elapsed
@alexbellos tl;dr: Efalex - suppliers of brainboosting omega supplements - sponsored his latest creation
@brittneybean my complaints about that article's logic last longer than a tweet
@aperfect it doesn't even make any sense, it's meant to be a page with the corner folded
incompletipedia: article titles ending in an ellipsis: http://j.mp/c5skcK
@peterrowlett just saw a very old book in Sedbergh on that subject. Bought another Hazel Perfect group theory book instead though
Being stalked by a van from wessington cryogenics. In stasis, no one can hear you scream for 80 years or so
that's nice, Vexed is very funny. I'll watch it from now on
@Electrokittie which is why you're now an Avon lady?
I need to get myself a tube of Eczemate, the only skin moisturiser endorsed by five reigning grandmasters
@aperfect yeah I'm amazed you've never heard of it. It's some guy's petty revenge for Mt Rushmore being scraped out of a sacred mountain
@aperfect do you get any nihilists turning up?
@trackinthebox I played Parov Stelar at a party last year and it got a stonier reception than an Iranian adultress
@Alternativemeat I prefer to view the ageing process as me continually setting Personal Bests for time spent on Earth
@brittneybean the moves he starts pulling at 1:24 are deadly serious.
11pm Wednesday radio 4 comedy is my favourite time, wavelength and genre combo http://beta.bbc.co.uk/i/tgf1c
@MEIMaths extremely useful, thanks!
@JSlayerUK Pizza Hut have been in trouble for quite a while now. They've just started making real pizzas again though, so who knows
@Electrokittie that's the most FFs I've ever seen. Is that your whole friends list?
@Electrokittie oh, but thanks for including me
@brittneybean also The Discretionary Purchases
I flipped all the pogs but they wouldn't let me keep them :(
yuk, I am using my old bluetooth mouse and it's like all my pointing desires are put through an "if you were old and infirm" filter
automatically find your next prime birthday(s) http://j.mp/93Psj6 @standupmaths @peterrowlett (will add explanatory text later)
@rockhyrax just had a look into allowing sequences from the OEIS but they don't have a nice API which gives enough elements
@Gelada feel free to re-use my javascript prime birthdays thing (http://j.mp/93Psj6) on primebirthday.org. It's very simple.
aaarh, now that's a third conference happening while I'm on holiday!
@standupmaths not undetectable, they told manufacturer how to detect & avoid it before they published. It's just a man-in-the-middle attack
@tynesidecinema please could you fix it for me so tynesidecinema.com redirects to www.tynesidecinema.com? It's always annoyed me
@alexbellos fairly sure I could make a necklace which could describe ALL of pi
@brittneybean good music!
September
@badmachinery what's your policy on fixing typos? "bgger" in today's first panel if you are pro-amendment
@aperfect oh it's a problem with your phone is it?
feel like achieving today. What to achieve? Your achievement suggestions, please!
@MarcusduSautoy that means set of uninteresting numbers is not well-defined, not that it is empty
@rockhyrax vanilla assassin. Be afraid
@JSlayerUK his face would probably benefit from a collision. No, that's harsh. Helmets aren't a legal requirement: http://j.mp/cAPUNa
@JSlayerUK yes that's important, but slightly inappropriate statistic. Replace women with 'world's pooreest X %' and you'd get similar
@JSlayerUK that's a fair compromise
is it just TeX that turns the letters 'fi' into a ligature which can't be copied and pasted correctly, or all PDFs? IT ANNOYS CP SO MUCH
I've been adding lots to my Interesting Esoterica mendeley collection recently: http://j.mp/cf8240
New mathem-o-blog post: Some notation for FPAs and HNN extensions (http://bit.ly/9vqLDu)
@Electrokittie you use THE MOST!!
why does windows think that the same mouse plugged into a different usb port is a different device?
what do you call people from Essex? Essecians? Anyway, I will start a company selling them glassware and call it "Verre Good"
This man has "TOON ARMY" tattooed across his knuckles in a very fetching Gill Sans. Aspirational tattooist or style-conscious hooligan?
@fumbleweeds "sandwiches which will prevent you from ever being able to open your mouth again"?
@brittneybean not really
@peterrowlett 12:34:56 is a valid, and better, time
@peterrowlett sheesh you know when you tweet something then instantly regret it? I forgot about seven
Super Monkey Cube #northkoreanvideogames
@brittneybean I would also prefer if 20% of my wages went to Jax, the best Mortal Kombat character
@HilariousCow isn't that just called a stable system?
@brittneybean unmix: skillful dissection of a song into its component influences
@RachaelBailes free food? macbook? Here we get to listen to construction all day, and I'm paying for the privilege
@HilariousCow it applies to your wall jumping thing though. Mario kart is engineered to be chaotic, or consider dice wars vs Risk
Sat opposite a thinner, ambiguously-aged Clare Balding lookalike who'd struggle to be heard amongst dormice. What job can she possibly do?
Off on holiday now, bye!
I am not linguistically equipped to operate in catalunya
Hooray, finally humanity has advanced enough to provide a PAYG sim with decent internet. And in crazy Spain, too!
http://plixi.com/p/45287289 nachos coyote, gone before I could blog them
Fairly sure it was the lemur that was made in God's image
@tynesidecinema a town called panic? In English? I will round up the troops!
euronews' "No comment" is top. 3 unedited minutes of prince William flying a sea king was more satirical than anything Bremner could manage
@Rosalot I thought you were a mackem?
@peterrowlett was going to tell you something interesting about symmetry and the Alhambra, but it's completely sold out. Wasted holiday!
No tickets available for the Alhambra and I've got food poisoning. Poo.
Cuboid walks into a bar. Barman says, "why the long face?"
Chia pets are the topiates of the masses
@divbyzero not to my knowledge. Geometry hasn't really had the pop-sci treatment at all, apart from golden ratio kooks
@peterrowlett I started with diagrams on mine - tesseract, sierpinski, etc
@divbyzero yes, maths teachers have been overly optimistic about what is well-known since time immemorial
The man next to me is not happy with his career choices. He is expressing this by playing games on his blackberry and sighing a lot. How sad
Oh no I've become one of those people who gets up ten minutes before the train stops. Blackberry man's awful worldview has contaminated me
@divbyzero thanks for that, added to my interesting erotica collection
@divbyzero sorry, was in reply to you sending me "misconceptions about the golden ratio" ages ago. I've just got back from holiday
@divbyzero oh god, just realised I typed erotica and not esoterica!! Oh dear oh dear!
@fumbleweeds just got to read about an older woman etc etc
Bresenham's algorithm and crossing Northumberland street when it's busy, theory and applications. C Perfect, 2010
esoterica enthusiasts: some Cambridge types built a set of logic gates from a model railway, but I can't find a reference. Does anyone know?
If this woman thinks she can walk faster than me, she needs to reevaluate. Bonus points for trying it with a week's shopping in hand though
@ProfKinyon thanks for that anyway, I'm writing a talk on Turing completeness in odd places, so that will make an appearance
October
@MEIMaths 227 is a more imminently achievable pi-related goal
mum just described Darlo as "down South". That's right.
@peterrowlett on my Spanish holiday I didn't see the alhambra but I did see the magic square on the sagrada familia: http://j.mp/94FBiu
Dear Messrs Everybody: I want to wear interesting clothes, but am extremely enormous. Suggestions please. Yrs from way up high, Christian
How do Galaxy benefit from me 100% fancying the woman in their ad? Like, I'd buy her some if I met her, seems she enjoys it, but otherwise..
ahhhhh rubik's deja-cube! I've just shuffled it into the exact same position as the last time! CAN'T HANDLE IT
@JSlayerUK your last tweet is magic and I have informed the Witchfinder General
@theyellowstereo it's not a laugh track, it's a live audience
English tests to gain citizenship are terrible and wrong, but I would advocate the compulsory removal of soulpatches
@divbyzero the sad thing is, they know the kind of people who dislike that ad are outnumbered by those who like it. They've done the math :(
@Electrokittie are you basing this on the new bit of Eldon Square, which is right next to where lots of chinese people live?
@Gelada I was really just going for a bit of irony with "do the math". The advert doesn't bother me
A Town Called Panic is on at the Tyneside on Friday. I am looking for people to see it with. http://j.mp/9NOjfg
@MarcusduSautoy was that copied out of a PDF? Sadly, my first thought on reading was about the missing fi ligature.
There is a dude on the metro wearing a bandana and fingerless gloves, as if Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3: Turtles In Time never happened
new mathem-o-blog post: Disappointing Stationery http://j.mp/bFD82X
@rockhyrax are these what I think they are? http://j.mp/a2xaC3
@rockhyrax at Bioparc in Valencia. It was a very friendly place for all sorts of animals. No koalas though :(
@brittneybean but they support kiva! It's microloans! A payday loans site would have a background the colour of old tobacco
mathmos: never forget the debt we owe to bankers (pun so intended). The maths behind making www.wonga.com look good to laymen must be hard
@WongaWoman I meant the maths you do to calculate your prices. Understanding of power series etc was motivated by banking
@Bishnavitch I hope you have one in XXL
pepsi are running a competition where a camera is given away every 10 minutes. Don't enter at lunchtime with the masses, so when is best?
@aperfect so not that, then. I am getting everyone's choices so I can rule them out. 4am is very popular
@aperfect so 3:50 is the logical choice
google keeps teelling me I'm sending automated requests because Google Instant is turned on
while I was away, Northumberland's Most Ginormous Spider looked after the flat for me http://post.ly/12Vd2
dear the priest who decided gaelic 'v' should be written 'mh' : why did you do that.
@Gelada are you doing maker faire again next year? I'd be willing to lend a hand if you are
has everybody in the world's msn account been hacked?
@peterrowlett @MarcusduSautoy 's www.mangahigh.com really is very good
@RachaelBailes seriously though / second year's a horror show / get your bum in gear
@brittneybean I thought you were winding up Belgians again
doing some old-school mousing with my beloved wireless intellimouse explorer. Why did I ever leave you?
@peterrowlett aaaaah I really want to go to that! Why must I live in the clean, friendly, cheap north?
@brittneybean don't worry, in 10,000 years Science will be able to make you sane again
@tynesidecinema has anyone said a town called panic yet? But only if I get to be the crossing guard. He's got everything in that shed.
@trackinthebox I wish to show my appreciation for good tracks, but am not obnoxious enough to post to facebook. Could you add a like button?
Worried my last words will be tedious, so "Rosebud" means more morphine and "this is the last of earth! I am content" means change my bedpot
@tynesidecinema did one better than RTing - I emailed the whole uni maths department. I may or may not go myself
@brittneybean is that like half a Yakoff Smirnoff joke?
dried yeast is like the essence of tiny insects in a powder . It loves sugar! Straight away it's like MNYUMNUMNYUM
My daily routine is in exact syncopation with the metro timetable
@tynesidecinema maths department trip update: the timing of the play conflicts with the pure maths seminar. Sorry!
Pigeon pecked at a lost malteser. Didn't like it, continued on its way.
geometers: is there such a thing as like a bezier curve on a sphere's surface, using maybe quaternions?
@beefok do you know any unlikely turing-complete machines? I'm compiling a list for a talk I'm givin in january?
@beefok oh no too many question marks? I didn't mean to do that?
no way, a Springer journal we have access to!
why does my kitchen smell of melons? There are no melons in my kitchen
@Bishnavitch what is the plan today? Can I come over to yours beforehand? I don't know where the showing place is
@divbyzero I don't know about that, it sort of looks like a fractal black armband already
It suddenly occurred to me while shaving to leave the mustache on. That was a scary thought.
Not pleased with the number of people for whom retro fashion means dressing like the worst person in the 80s
@HilariousCow I've just been doing lots of quaternion stuffin BlitzMax. I could write a post on my maths-code blog if you'd like
@HilariousCow well, I'm a professional mathematician, so I can probably help you with that
@HilariousCow do you still use your msn account? I can't DM you.
@Htbaa truth
@fumbleweeds it means you won't be seeing any grey squirrels for a while
Hey, @alltheworldschocolate, get over here.
@trackinthebox could you please at least spell-check take-overs, viz. yesterday's post
@JSlayerUK bravo!
FESH AN CHEPS !!!
new mathem-o-blog post: some awful maths jokes http://checkmyworking.com/?p=269
@fumbleweeds as a geordie, I must be transatlantically outraged at anyone wearing more than a t-shirt and shorts in that weather
my sinuses seem to be competing for the job of digestive tract. Is this the Big Society? Eggy nostrils aren't in the coalition agreement
@brittneybean I will add to your misery: the top About/Contact links and the footer text are invisible with the special template
@brittneybean I'm colourblind
@tynesidecinema sorry, I've got a thing on tonight
@Bishnavitch sounds like a Samuel Pepys diary: filed insurance papers then to Newcastle where I saw Mr MUTHURANGU flip some 20 stairs
was the transylvania lottery conceived just so maths lecturers can have an example application of the fano plane?
hooray! > @nulibsage: We're trialling the Springer ebooks collection. Explore 20,000 titles at http://j.mp/ahrg4q
there's a pretty tasty pizza in the oven. Will update if it turns out it *is* possible to put too much chicken and bacon on
tonight's episode of White's was like any insufferable indie film of the past decade
@Bishnavitch no update necessary, more evidence there is no such thing as too much chicken and bacon
I made like a cargo cult sandwich. There's no need for tomato to be in a coronation chicken sandwich but I put it in because the shop does
@Bishnavitch I don't think even skinheads would be in the mood to do anything bad the way this match is going
@standupmaths The Good Soldier Svejk (unlikely to be in a railway waterstone's) or Jose Saramago
@Martinmagnusson you haven't really; what if dropbox goes bust?
@brittneybean that would be cutting right in to the product they're trying to create
November
Can't be doing with this. I've got Bell's palsy, of all things. Good grief!
@JSlayerUK it's what you have to have in bizarro-world prison
@kenfodder you can have my htc magic when I finally manage to get an upgrade
oh dear I have eaten chocolate instead of dinner
@brittneybean were they the ones with the sexy cover art and nothing else a while ago?
man if I wanted to hear So What then I wouldn't be listening to radio nova
"In an ambulance. Agency will provide new clown. Dictated but not read. BONZO" - most tragic text?
about.com is like wikipedia but with "As a mother," prepended to every article
@monsterthreads just got your mad discountravaganza email. I will spend lots with you if you make XXL Guys things
Phrasebook for the linguistics professor's new cleaner. Schwa: shower. Diphthong: bidet.
@nilium just got an Android 2.2 phone so I bought your wallpaper thingy. It's nice!
@peterrowlett Rosza Peter is a good candidate - did lots of good working in computability
@peterrowlett oh, I had forgotten what the post is about! Just treated on my phone without looking
engineers: if another one of you uses 'O' as the name of a variable which could equal 0, I will just give up. No more help from me.
does anyone know if it's possible to obtain this t-shirt http://j.mp/ap0UeA in the UK or Europe?
@JSlayerUK sorry, have we been annoying you lately? I'll pass a memo round at the next meeting
@jefferickson some top tweets today, keep it up!
Ive always wondered why the old lady upstairs needs a car. It turns out she drives it across the road to the metro station
@aperfect what's wrong with that? It's quite a nice sculpture.
@aperfect what's wrong with that? It's a nice sculpture, and the video both explained the "algorithmic" bit and was nice to watch
Saw a girl in a @monsterthreads hoodie. It was good.
I just recommended Bleak Expectations - Series 4 http://bbc.in/btsxPQ
@brittneybean welcome to the club; your membership card got lost in the wash. I'm sure you understand
@mathpunk that depends on if the Infinite Taco is well-defined. If it's full of mystery meat from a sketchy streetvendor, you've got a point
"a confident, shotgun-wielding young woman"
it tastes like there's raw meat in this sandwich
thai green curry: not for cp
my breadmaker is keeping time with Kermit Ruffins pretty much perfectly. So bourgeois.
@brittneybean there are so many problems with bitcoin
@brittneybean so many that, like, whuffie has more merit as a concept
I just had a like 30 minute dream about dogs and the iPhone, all for a pun which didn't even work in the end. I want a refund.
Angles this girl is beautiful from, in radians: pi. Reason for same: pie.
Sorry, that girl doesn't really exist, I'm not that shallow.
oh poo, someone has already made noetherian matryoshka dolls
@guardianscience "math"?
little known fact: henri poincare's head could split in half to reveal the bizarre shape of space: http://j.mp/bH2S4h
@aperfect HOW CAN YOU SEE ME YOU'RE MILES AWAY AAAAA
@JSlayerUK don't worry, most of the money goes to music execs and shareholders who were always Tories anyway
@Electrokittie "Alasia" sounds like an airline with a patch safety record
Recorded a miserable DNQ in today's 500m Banana Transport. Dropped my bag at the last moment; banana sustained a crowd-pleasing instant KO
@JSlayerUK nope
@JSlayerUK the only response that provoked in me is: WHEEEEEEE! I'm rich, white and male! Wahey! What's troubling you? gtalk me or whatnot
@joemanaco http://j.mp/f2wV7Z was indispensable to me, especially the Best Tips page http://j.mp/gU4DtY
I think I've got Stockholm syndrome with Bill. It's maths time and all I can think of is work to do on the web exam thing
@Bishnavitch have you changed your train ticket or not?
@JSlayerUK aughh, why do I always have to learn about bad policy from you? It is causing bad psychological connections to be formed
Driving in the snow was a challenge
@HilariousCow intrinsic: the noise when you pick up food in wolfenstein 3d. Extrinsic: xbox achievements
If I'd gone to a posher school, I would've started a third-wave ska/punk band called "Cave Diem, Carpe Canem"
I love cabinet magazine, I really do.
Parallel Parking on Ice might not be Disney's next song and dance spectacular but it is my new favourite hobby
How does cress get away with having such tiny leaves? What's its game? Is it really a plant?
I've just discovered you can drag a shape in google calendar to create an event! Now I will have more time to do the things I put in there!
Madjo: so hot right now.
so now I know how much dust my hoover picks up in a year
The panda hat is the new Ugg boot. I've seen more people wearing one in the past two days than I can handle. Where do they come from?
OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies. Tonight, 9pm, BBC Four. Every single person watch it, please.
seriously everybody: OSS 117, BBC Four, now.
Well done, skater kids, for finding somewhere dry to skate on the day your school is closed because of the snow
my knee is moments away from dislocating completely
OK, don't be angry, but I've made the best sandwich. It doesn't make yours any worse, it's just that mine is better.
because my Dad can't go, he's given me his tickets to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue on the 8th of Dec. Who would like to go? I have 4 tickets
December
@MagBilliardsDev does the finger lift fix involve using the position from say 50ms before the finger-up event?
Dear All: please stop emailing me for a bit. I'm trying to think
@Electrokittie plus or minus. You use it when there are two solutions to an equation
@brittneybean Esperanza Spalding is a really really good jazz singer. She has an eponymous album which you maybe need to get right now
@brittneybean you will like this though
Slow Club finally understands partial isometries and Cuntz-Krieger algebras. Medals all round!
@aperfect call that snow? You've gone soft!
@aperfect holy quick reply, Batman! 25 seconds!
found a spade; cleared path to front door; old lady upstairs came down to say thankyou. So that settles whether she died in the cold or not
@brittneybean is this page meant to be public? http://j.mp/gLn4qI
I've started using Texmaker with synctex to automatically scroll the PDF preview to what I'm writing. I miss vim shortcut keys though.
@brittneybean I only found it because I'm sure you've done James Blake's Feist cover twice. Wasn't it in like the first week you did?
@brittneybean Apparently so!
@JSlayerUK opinions for opinions' sake?
Why have the royal mail not cleared their own driveway?
@HilariousCow is that a diet one can consciously follow?
@standupmaths next we'll discover that some pharma company is selling them mechanical integrators at 1200% markup
Last call: who would like to see I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, the funny radio programme, at City Hall 6pm on Wednesday?
@Bishnavitch no, 4pm wednesday! I can't do 2-4
@Bishnavitch ok then
@Bishnavitch no, I'm seeing I'm sorry I haven't a clue after. Do you want to come?
My gcse maths tutor came out with some top algebra today: what is P divided by 2? "J and a half"
I of course meant my gcse maths _tutee_
Oh dear, recruiters: please be a little bit clever about how your targeted marketing works, or I can do things like this http://j.mp/gtL4pB
@brittneybean I have thought of a social network game based on sorting mail. Is that more or less tedious than farming? Is more better?
What's the point of this site? http://www.working-days-left.com/
beginning to have a bit of a freak out that javascript is not type-safe. Maybe my code doesn't need to be *that* error-resistant.
my heating won't come on! So cold
@ColinTheMathmo: the page is giving 404 for me, but if it's the stained glass window with the Julia set in, it's a coincidence
has there ever been a natural explosion on earth sufficiently powerful to propel something decently-sized into space?
@GreyAlien thanks for that
It's all gone! The BBC say some places heated up by 20 degrees last night. We get to miss the horrible icechaton stage, hooray!
@divbyzero @TeXtip I feel the Journal of Unpublishable Mathematics will benefit from this tip.
In 1933, during a lecture on quantum mechanics by Werner Heisenberg, Piet Hein invented the soma cube puzzle. Dude had his priorities right.
At age 12, Piet's son Jotun proved that a certain shape was impossible to make with the soma pieces, by a parity argument.
Uncle Ben's risotto: bad or worst?
@aperfect They are from my Strategic Reserve. I am quite ill, but I think I'll stick with sausage beans from now on
@peterrowlett fairly sure they mention it in the In Our Time programme on Archimedes, but there's no text search. Trust wikipedia
what's the deal with Tesco sending me my password in plaintext?
@JSlayerUK but he should try not to do that in Qatar
can someone write a program which analyses Tesco online and lists all the things where the multipack is more expensive, for shame purposes?
I think I misunderstood the concept of dvds when I bought my collection. I've just rejected every one I own because I've already seen them.
@aperfect Special Tactice is of course the name of Vladimir Putin's line of fragrances
who thought that Quake 3 on the Xbox would be a good idea?
@brittneybean Paul Graham is the Roger Federer of writing 10k words on a thesis that was flawed from the first paragraph.
interactive geometry in javascript http://jsxgraph.uni-bayreuth.de/wp/ I am so happy
@Electrokittie seek justice in small claims court!
bugs are always in the last line you look, but when that line has a comment "THIS IS A HUGE BUG, FIX IT SOON", you can only blame yourself
Wakey uppy number 3 and it still isn't even 8am. I want to have more dreams about Japanese Dr who!
@peterrowlett bad news: it looks like 'math' outdid 'maths' for a lot of history: http://bit.ly/dElkT2
there might as well be a new christmas song http://heideckerandwood.com/
Is anyone else's mum having trouble understanding why the latest car reg is 60 and not 50?
Roast dinner of genus 6 http://bit.ly/hOPXAU
@Electrokittie I like your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter
@standupmaths I always thought shaving was something I would start doing when I was old and responsible
@Electrokittie straight back atcha!
Woke up at 8 with the yoshi theme in my head, have been humming it continuously ever since. Decided to start adding in sound effects
@aperfect it costs £3 more in tynemouth. Franchises get to set their own prices
In just before the buzzer with the longest single peristaltic motion of 2010. I'm sure I heard it say 'papa' before it went on its travels
2011
January
I was banker in French monopoly, brother took money from the bank, I said "mi caisse es tu caisse", multi-lingual pun #funniestmanalive
@badmachinery my dad gets a new pen every christmas but can't draw, so pen fetish -> artistry is ruled out. artistry -> fetish still poss.
@standupmaths or how about a tiny tiny version (click on Proceed to this site at the bottom) http://tinyurl.com/2eosgvs
@eqdynamics why are you telling me this now?
@eqdynamics which one?
@brittneybean CFCs, which were causing the holes to grow, were banned ages ago. So problem solved, as far as we're able
@brittneybean was the email I just got from quora automatic or did you actually invite me?
@Electrokittie not necessarily
enjoy this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_7wh_ClamA
@brittneybean replace 'agenda' with 'brag' and you have a conversation in a maths department
@HilariousCow that would certainly make assassin's creed more playable. I want to know when animation skeletons will have movable shoulders
I love Germany and Germans. Look at this shop! I would buy lots of them if I was impulsive http://tinyurl.com/32vfkz6
another meal, another cut finger
a reading of the hardest recipe ever, farce double: http://tinyurl.com/yb5ovg5
making all my cookery books better by adding this step to every recipe: leave in fridge overnight; reheat in microwave.
Raskulls is fun! It's like sideways Mr Driller with alternatively cute characters
oh dear. Failing the Bechdel test is the least of Raskulls' problems with female characters
@divbyzero first thing he'd do would be to close the door to make sure he's inside.
going to change my name to Christian My-Middle-Name Perfect, so I can say "'my middle name' is my middle name" and be right twice
@Bishnavitch as strong as your relationship is, I'm not sure it's strong enough to withstand a forced viewing of that film
@theyellowstereo Hooray! I need some good new music.
@theyellowstereo but the yahoo player thing is taking a few attempts before it'll play each track
@brittneybean so that 'abbrv.' in dictionaries is autologic
trademarks should work the other way too, so if the people decide on a better name for a business they have to use it, eg marks and sparks
you left snot rags in my car @aperfect
@alexbellos if anything is a candidate for my Interesting Maths Esoterica collection, that is. Hugely impressive.
@mathshistory is there nobody notable who shares my birthday? So if I try hard enough, in 100 years it could be me today?
@maricarjagger @peterrowlett http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmVOZ8WJKp4 as a silly first entry
@kenfodder thanks!
@brittneybean ta like
@brittneybean fairly sure there's an app for that
@peterrowlett playing a game last night, players asked if we were rolling too many 8s. Engineer friend used Excel, I wrote probability table
Audacious Parking dot com http://twitpic.com/3qkqrq
@brittneybean sort of not-quite-great film though
@brittneybean it's worth watching, but wasn't as amazing as the title
why does an image search for "not surprised" give so many results of young people at parties?
what a nice girl on the phones at Domino's. What a pity there's no way I can sound attractive calling up at 5.30 for a single pizza
@TeXtip if that's in reference to multi-part function definitions, MathJax supports all of amsmath, including \cases
javascript's console.log can substitute parameters like printf. Sitar music is playing as my mind opens up to a new world
@Bishnavitch that is a cracker of a joke
I want to buy a coin sorter. 99% of hits are the same electronic one with different brands. Surely there don't need to be any moving parts?
@Bishnavitch videos soon?
@Gelada oh, to be in a department with money to fritter on "decoration" and "walls"...
Ana Tijoux: pretty good!
TEAM MEMO: Pick your new nickname from here http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/2011/01/the_20_best_nic.php cp is now "Tony Bagels"
how is the Wikipedia page on Loci so short? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Locus_(mathematics)
@HoeJodgkiss oh no I've just realised orangutans don't even exist in India
@aperfect mudlarking on the thames sand banks http://www.walks.com/Homepage/Beachcombing_Walks/default.aspx
@Bishnavitch it's more of an art project than a joke, but no they're not serious
Monday: meetings. Tuesday-Wednesday-Thursday: Maths-Aid; xbox. Friday: clean house. Oh no I have a routine!
@aperfect too late for mudlarking, you fool!
is there a site like the Hype Machine that doesn't consist solely of remixes and Kanye West-alikes?
@aperfect oh no, too many rough surfaces. Graze City. LEAVE YOUR HOUSE
@HilariousCow What's wrong with the DLR? Do you have bankerphobia?
The mario tune is so good; how come it wasn't composed before? cf Uptown Girl uses Mozart melody http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXjsoZG9mxQ
@HoeJodgkiss now whenever you cross a border it'll look like your life has taken a turn for the worse, all tie and shirtless.
@MagBilliardsDev is that just on the last table or on all of them?
@mathshistory in the past two days I've learnt about two mathematicians born within a couple of miles of me! Let's hope this rate keeps up
@kenfodder happy birthday! I hope Adam has done something nice for you
This bad music album I downloaded yesterday seems to have transmogrified into a good music album overnight
@beefok very possibly. Level 3 was ruthless
since when does it take 48 hours for an undelivered parcel to get back to the sorting office?
maths teachers: is there somewhere a short list of topics covered in the most popular A-Level Maths & Further Maths modules?
@MalloryJenkins can I ask who you meant to @ mention there? I get loads of people accidentally typing my username
@mathshistory the twitter experiment is going very well, thank you
a three-day experiment in broadcasting field recordings, sounds, etc. (it's the most pretentious thing, be warned) http://ustre.am/sVCP !
@mathshistory euff, you've already made me join the IMA! Maybe I will join one when the other runs out
@MalloryJenkins I live nowhere near there. I'm in the north of England. I wonder why my tweets are showing up in CA
@for_the_winn when did you join twitter? I've just noticed I'm not following you!
In the alternate universe where everybody is an artist, what does Mr Spock say when he wakes up?
@stewartandco I have to walk up northumberland street to get to work but I always forget you're at the library and miss out on tasty food :(
@Gelada gospel truth
@brittneybean every time you use t.co to shorten a url I think of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEr-AKJr-LI
aaaahhhhh when did nurse jackie series 2 start?
February
@standupmaths so jealous. Our maths building is being recladded with boring squares
In the emptiest cinema watching everyone's third choice film.
what is even the point in finish-in-the-oven baguettes? I have yet to succesfully slice one in half and fit my lunch in
If the people upstairs just put their shoes on at the front door instead of in the bedroom I could sleep in for another hour each day
Sat on a train driving on the right hand side. Everything about this is wrong. Expect to start walking on the ceiling soon
what's the maximum number of wiggly things I should tolerate making their ablutions in the shower with me? Today two wigglies and a spider
@rockhyrax no such pity from CP. At this moment they are probably somewhere out in the North Sea.
it's possible that I love mozzarella too much
how is this even a niche? http://butchesholdinganimals.tumblr.com/archive
play asteroids in a hyperbolic space (actually interesting!) http://www.paradise.caltech.edu/~cook/Workshop/Java/SpaceJewels/main.html
@aperfect indeed!
Dear Diary, What a lovely day I've had!
@aperfect a case of the Hong Kong SoHo phenomenon, I'd wager
I'm such an avant-garde hipster I've decided to become an inventor so the things I do now become obsolete, and I can then do them ironically
I'm going to open a kilt shop called Knick-Knack-Plaidy-Whack
do green and brown go together?
@HilariousCow can you draw a picture of what shape the input looks like, or can I test this with an xbox controller plugged in a PC?
@HilariousCow looks like +-30 degrees clips to a line. Here's bmax code http://tinyurl.com/6lctwt7 and a demo http://tinyurl.com/5vbvbpm
@theyellowstereo what kind of thing would you cover?
@theyellowstereo should I have commented more? the daily/weekly graboid was my main source of good new music
@theyellowstereo and if you'd had ads which sometimes weren't for american apparel, I might've clicked them
there goes another big bar of dairy milk
scandalous! My campaign against mad facebook dating ads is just making them worse: "Find the 1 (or 2) at DateBridge"
New mathem-o-blog post: A demo of the Numbas maths exam system. http://checkmyworking.com/?p=274
for people who can finish the cryptic crossword before breakfast, the escorts advertising in the LRB Personals aren't very subtle
@peterrowlett our professor of pure maths (Sarah Rees) uses a Tablet PC in lectures. Just Journal + lots of scrolling, I think.
@gingerbeardman do you have a copy of the monkey logo that I could use in my matrix multiplying monkeys example?
@gingerbeardman ehh, 400x400?
applewood smoked cheddar in a jardine's kettle chilli con queso OH MAN
New mathem-o-blog post: Not-quite-slides from a talk about Turing completeness (http://bit.ly/fqkdIh)
@beefok you say numbers and acronyms and I am impressed even thought I don't know what they mean
newsjack is back! http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00yc08c/Newsjack_Series_4_7_Premiere/
POWER YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWN
Very good meeting today, but now I have to get the metro at school kicking-out time, and then drive through the Tyne tunnel at rush hour :(
The Romanian restaurateurs' association invites you to "Bucharest, Buchatable"
my Drink Stiffness Preference is edging up; currently at "2-ply cardboard" -- double measures of squash; five scoops of hot choc
hid the dog's toy in a really good place. He is more stumped than the combined English cricket teams of the 1990s
I love Germany and Germans http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_06qrFnvnw
@ColinTheMathmo does the proof of that involve numbers mod 4? I'm just a group theorist, proper numbers hurt my head
@ColinTheMathmo jolly good, I've got it right then. I'm not a good group theorist, but know some. What's your problem?